Delusions of Grandeur

Early Emily blogs, pt 4

2009-04-26T20:02:00.001-07:00

Poor baby

Well, it had to happen. Emily actually got really sick and scared me half to death! She is fine now and it really turned out to be just a super-charged cold, but the child does have a flair for the dramatic (as anyone who has ever met her already knows).

On Wednesday, Emily woke up not feeling well and was lethargic and listless. Even with Tylenol all day, her temperature went up to103.2. That is too high for my baby! We called the on-call doctor for the first time ever. Very stressful. The doctor said not to worry and we waited until morning to have her checked out. We went to the doctor Thursday morning (we arrived at 6:00 am and we were not the first ones there) where Emily had a fever, but was playing and laughing...until the doctor came in. Then Emily began screaming and crying so hard she eventually made herself sick. When the doctor asked how she was feeling, her response was "I not talk about it". Turns out it was a respiratory virus, nothing to do but rest, tylenol, and fluids. Eventually, it turned out to be a bad cold with a fever. She was pretty pitiful with her eyes and nose running "My eyes mommy, my nose" Eventually, it just became "Nosey" and a point to her face. She can wipe her own nose usually, just ask Grannie who runs out of tissues whenever Emily is over, but I indulged her since she was so pitiful. After a couple days of laying around the house, watching lots of Dora, she is pretty much recovered. I knew she was feeling better when she wanted to call Poppi and left him a message of "Poppi I feel better." I bet he still hasn't erased that message!

The funny thing now is that she has a raspy voice that is sooo cute. She could pretty much get anything she wanted right now (probably can anyway) with that cute voice. The sad part of all this that Nana, Pop pop, and I all caught her cold and suffered greatly this weekend. As Pop pop so eloquently put it "How can anyone so smll and cute spread so much misery around?"

Since everyone is getting healthy now, we will hopefully have lots of fun stuff to report about soon.

2007-05-07 01:39:49 GMTComments: 1 |Permanent Link

Planting marigolds

Emily talking to her seeds

2007-04-23 03:27:00 GMTComments: 1 |Permanent Link

Entry for April 22, 2007

Hello! This is my first time "blogging" so please bear with me. I guess this is what I get for complaining that Bruce didn't update Emily's site often enough. I am starting out simple, but trust me it will get more interesting.

Over Spring Break, Emily and I planted Marigold, lavender, and lima bean seeds (though Emily was expecting instruments to grow after watching Little Einsteins). Emily would not touch the dirt, but she did drop the seeds in (from a distance) and water them. Emily was very excited about her seeds and we kept checking throughout the day for progress. I guess her sense of time is a little off still. Our seeds started out well, with marigold sprouts by the end of the week. That was the end of the progress unfortuantely because then we had our huge windstorm with really cold temperatures for a week . Our seeds suffered, but we have started the revival process this weekend. Emily still likes to check them out everytime we return home from somewhere, which in our world is very often. She is very cute, bending down and talking to them. I am not sure what she says, but I bet it will work. To help Emily out while they grow, we did buy full-grown marigolds for the garden. She helped plant them by digging in the dirt with a (clean) shovel while kneeling on a kneepad. No dirt for this girl!

2007-04-23 03:25:38 GMTComments: 1 |Permanent Link

April 16, 2007

Welcome! This is Bruce speaking, and while I may have set this up, and you may hear occassionally from me on this blog, have no doubt that this is KT's Korner, whole domain where Emily's mommy can have her say about anything she wants. But those of us that know her have no doubt that it will mostly be about Emily :) So without further adieu, I'll let the lady of the house have her say....

2007-04-17 02:54:39 GMTComments: 1 |Permanent Link

Early Emily blogs, pt 3

2009-04-26T19:57:00.000-07:00

One more school picture

Emily taking a rest in the moonbounce.

2007-06-20 18:44:51 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

More school pictures

I do not know how to add more than 1 picture to an entry yet (I am still learning.)

2007-06-20 18:43:31 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

Emily's school visit

We went to Preschool fun day at Emily's new school (Valley Drive Preschool). It was the graduation for 4 year olds and welcoming for new 2 year olds. It was a lot of fun and really well organized-a good sign. Emily fit right in with the 2 year olds and had a blast making spin art, playing ring toss, climbing on the cool play equipment and junping in the moon bounce. The best part was when the classes would line up to go to the next "area", Emily got right in line and waited her turn. (Gymboree is paying off!) Emily now plays school at home with her cheetah lunchbox, Dora books, and crayons. It is very cute because I am "teacher mommy" and we do storytime, snacktime, and other fun activities. She is really looking forward to school in September (she just doesn't realize teacher mommy is not going with her.)

2007-06-20 18:40:31 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

Happy Father's Day (a little late)

I just wanted to wish all of the fathers out there a Happy Father's Day, especially Emily's daddy. Emily's current favorite things to do with daddy are to play baseball and sneak up on him and tickle his ear.

I am staying home all summer with Emily and it should be lots of fun (hopefully I won't spend too much money.) We have already gone to the zoo on the hottest day ever (if you ask her what her favorite animal was at the zoo, she will say the giraffe, cute except there was no giraffe to see.) We have big plans for Sesame Place, the watermine, and vists with her friends Ella, Jonah, Cooper, and Sully. Also, mommy and daddy went to Jimmy's wedding (it was very nice) and Emily had her first 2 night sleepover with Granny and Poppi. They all survived!

Also, on the growing list of cute sayings- I asked Emily to help me remember to get diapers and her response was "Everybody needs help mommy. It's okay." Awwwww!

2007-06-20 18:31:56 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

An update on Emily

Things with Emily are crazy as ever. We will be going to the Preschool Fun Day at Emily's preschool this week. I can't believe she is old enough for preschool. It is going sooo fast! Emily is now in 3 Gymboree classes (I can't bring myself to cancel any of them.) On Saturdays, she goes to music with Ms. Christina and enjoys playing the triangle and xylophone. This is the class we will probably drop for the summer. The timing is really difficult and she is not as engaged in the activities. She also attends art with Ms. Karen on Mondays. She really enjoys this class and is making baby steps towards getting messy. The coolest part of this class was when Emily learned to do a relay race. Ms. Karen gave each child a crayon. Whne the music started they had to run up to their paper and color. When the music stopped, the kids ran back and got a new color, and this kept going for 5-6 colors. I was so excited that Emily figured this out on the first try! I sat back and just encouraged her, but she did it all by herself. She even began watching Ms. Karen to anticipate the music changes. On Thursdays, Emily goes to a combo play and music class. This is the class with most of our friends. We have been with these kids for at least 5-6 months (some for almost a year). We are going to try summer playdates with Leanna. Should be interesting! We have gone to several very cool birthday parties with these friends.

This summer should be busy. Mommy is staying home and not working (1st time since 9th grade). Emily and I have big plans to go to the pool, the playground, go to the zoo, go for long walks, and get potty trained!! We will also have a fun visit with Sarah, Ella, and Jonah when they come up in July, a trip to the beach, a rocking party for Sully's birthday in June, and a trip to Sesame Place on July 1. Should be exciting :)

Emily's favorite thing to do now is sing a long to her Cds and Tv shows. It is very cute because she really does know the words, especially her new Wonder Pet cd we listen to in the car everyday. This girl just continues to amaze and surprise us with the stuff that comes out of her mouth. I thought I would post some of the funny, crazy quotes we have gotten lately from Emily.

Going into McDonald's "Nana, I have my moments." Isn't that the truth? (A direct quote from everyone's favorite Wonder Pet- Ming Ming.)
At the DC Divas football game, Emily wanted to dance with daddy. Daddy was actually trying to watch the game so Emily tried to convince him "Daddy, don't be shy. It's okay."
Emily and I were singing songs at bedtime and she wanted to sing a duck song. I was not sure what song she was talking about so I asked her to sing a little. Her response "Mommy, I'm just a little baby, I can't do it myself."
In art class, when Ms. Karen asks for the magic word to open the treasure box, Emily always responds with "Abre." Please forgive my spelling, I do not know how to spell the spanish word for open.
While playing "babies" Emily was pretending to be a baby and crying in her daddy's arms. Then she said the baby needs to go in her stroller. I told her we didn't have a stroller inside, it was out in the car. Her response "Mommy, we can just pretend, okay." Made me feel silly.

I am sure there will be much more soon. Thanks for reading

2007-06-04 01:51:13 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

Emily, the early blogs pt 2

2009-04-26T19:52:00.000-07:00

More Funny faces

Her favorite face for pictures.

2007-08-06 01:45:46 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

Baseball celebrations

She is not one to hide how she feels.

2007-08-06 01:43:10 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

Playing baseball with daddy

One of Emily's new games is to play baseball with daddy. Emily loves holding her bat and having daddy pitch the ball to her. Daddy has been proving what a good pitcher he is by throwing the ball directly at her bat so she gets a hit almost everytime. We will worry about the real world and she won't always get a hit, blah, blah later. Trust me, her celebration dance is worth it. "I scored! I scored!"

2007-08-06 01:39:33 GMTComments: 1 |Permanent Link

Visiting with friends Cooper and Sully

In July, we were very lucky and it worked out that Abbie and her cute boys (except for Jim) were able to come stay with us for a few days. It was a crazy couple days with 3 kids under age 3, but it was fun. I even borrowed the minivan from my dad- that was really cool. Emily really enjoyed seeing her friends Cooper (2 1/2 ) and Sully (14 months). She was really good at sharing (mostly) and even let Cooper sleep in her room in her crib! Sharing toys was a little harder. At one point Emily was running around the house carrying a toy saying "Help me, help me he's gonna get it." Fortuantely, Emily's overreaction was too much for Cooper and he realized it wasn't worth it and moved on. At that point I adopted Sarah's strategy of if you don't want to share it, it has to be put away before friends come over.

We were able to get our acts together enough to go to Burke Lake Park and played on the playground and walked down to the water (once the kids finally woke up. They all 3 fell asleep right before we pulled into the park. ) Emily was very cute leading us on "the dangerous path" through the woods and being quiet so we didn't wake the animals up. We all had fun throwing sticks in the lake (probably scaring away all the fish from the fisherman). The kids were really cute playing together. I just thought the picture of Emily and Cooper walking in the woods was so sweet.

The most interesting thing about their visit actually started a week after Abbie and the boys had left. Emily's new favorite game is to pretend to be Sully. This is quite an in-depth game too. I have to go by "Ms. Abbie" and nana is "Cooper" and I am supposed to address her by "Sully" or she will correct me. She tells me "Ask Sully what he wants" or "Sully needs his baby toys." It actually lasted over a day and a half once! She has quite the imagination.

2007-08-06 01:31:43 GMTComments: 1 |Permanent Link

Splashdown Waterpark

In June, Bruce and I made an impromptu decision to take Emily to her first waterpark. We went to Splashdown Waterpark in Manassas. Very fun! We only stayed a couple hours, but I definitely feel we got our money's worth. Emily enjoyed riding the lazy river with daddy, splashing in the pools, playing with the water fountains, and she even went down the slide a couple times. She was hesitant about the large pools and crowds of people, but she did a great job and had a lot of fun. Those of you who know of Emily's eating issues (and who doesn't?) will be happy to hear that she ate most of my pizza slice that day. She hadn't had pizza in months. It's a start at least.

2007-08-06 01:12:31 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

In the beginning...

2009-04-26T19:38:00.000-07:00

Okay, so now for a little something out of the ordinary.

A few years ago, in a state of temporary insanity did a website --part of which was to catalog my independent film efforts and the other part to chronicle the growing life of Emily. I never did develop at all the indie film side (I've got Keith and his website for that! :) But I did get into Emily's side and was doing some things.

However, the last thing I did for it, much like this blog, was long ago, so I've decided to shelve it...for now. Someday I'll get all my internet skills in a row, but these days there's far too much going on for me to develop it into what I want it to become. But I didn't want to lose the good stuff on there, soooooo...I'm tranferring it to here. So what you'll see is 19 pages of early Emily in its glory with a blog started by Katie that I gave her space for on the website. She has since blossomed on her own and has her own blogspot universe, but here's the early days. Enjoy!
-Bruce

Preschool!!!!!

Ok, we survived preschool. Emily is now sleeping and recovering.

She woke up at 4:30 and was wide awake all morning. She was worried when I reminded her we had to get ready for school. Her response "All by myself today?" Later, she assured me she would be fine.

We got to school and she freaked out a little at the idea of kids going in first and playing with her toys, but I assured they were older kids. We found a friend outside and they walked over together :) We went in well (until someone pushed by her on the stairs and I had to carry her.) In the room she started playing but got upset when she couldn't take her shoes off (I had double-knotted them!) I calmed her down and then got ready to leave. She ran to me "Mommy I am scared!" I did not think this would end well. I calmed her down again and then a good parent who was co-oping asked if Emily would play with her and they were off. I waited for the "runners" to do 2 checks, no crying, so we were good :)

After, she was exhausted and hungry. She cried to just go home. She didn't even want lunch with Nana and Poppop. We came straight home and she begged for a nap. (Her usual naptime is 3:00).

We seem to have survived.

2007-09-11 20:35:26 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

Kids say the cutest things...

Everyone who knows Emily, knows that you never know what will come out of her mouth. Well, here are a few of the recent quotes to make you smile. I hope they translate into writing and it isn't one of those "you had to be there things."

Opening a new Happy Meal toy (an everyday occurrence)

"That is the cutest thing I have ever seen."

When I carried her across the grass

"Mommy you are so courageous."

Walking into Granny and Poppi's house with new pictures on the wall

"This is amazing!"

2007-08-17 21:31:10 GMTComments: 1 |Permanent Link

Visit with Ella and Jonah

In July, we were lucky enough to have an extended visit with Sarah, Ella, and Jonah (we missed you Andrew). Mommy and Sarah got to have grown-up meals without kids. Wow!!! We actually went to grown up places- Los Tios (our favorite) and the Chart House in Old Town with grown up food, drinks,..... It was really lovely. On Wednesday, Ella, Emily, and Jonah had a great time playing at our house, eating at ... McDonald's of course, and playing at Burke Lake Park. We rode the train and the carousel and then wandered the nature path until we found an amphitheater. The kids had tons of fun until the huge downpour!

Ella and her tiny friend Emily

So sweet

These girls were born to be onstage!

Ella teaching Emily a dance routine.

Emily was actually doing some of the steps at the pool a month later!

I think Jonah was wondering what these crazy girls were doing.

Overall, a great visit.

2007-08-09 02:51:22 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

Emmy and Poppi

So sweet!

2007-08-06 02:07:41 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

Funny face

She loves it when you say "pose for the camera."

2007-08-06 02:04:35 GMTComments: 0 |Permanent Link

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First Week

2009-03-26T04:57:00.000-07:00

Wow, it’s been since ’06 since I wrote in this thing. It seems I only do it when the Steelers win the Super Bowl, so if you want to hear more, they’d better win again next season!

But really, I decided to blog my first week at the new gig because invariable everyone asks, “How’s it going?” and rather than bore everyone with the same story, I figured, why not give a blow by blow detail on one easily accessible space? That way everyone’s happy J

Day 1: Typical first day at a new place. I spend the morning in FAMS HQ in Reston filling out enough paperwork to think I was buying a house again. Invariably the HR person going through this torture with you is your new tour guide to your new job, and mine is Henry Mak (his last name is MUCH longer, but I don’t want to run the risk of mispronouncing it or misspelling it, so he gets shortened). Henry’s an affable fellow -- early thirties, cool – but the weirdest thing is…he’s not HR!!! He’s the exec assistant to the three head honchos. But he’s the one showing me around, introducing me to people, helping me fill out the forms. So hey, this is how they roll, eh?

After signing my life away and ensuring my benefits and government life continue uninterrupted (cross your fingers!), I’m whisked away to take the oath to serve my country. Now, I’ve done this before with the Agency, but that was in a group. So it’s sort of intimidating with my big boss, his second in command, my direct boss, and Henry standing there as I almost have a Justice Roberts moment while being sworn in.

I eat lunch with new best friend Henry and make my way to my new “home”…Ashburn, VA. Yay! For those of you who don’t know where that is, it’s in BFE…well, it was BFE before Leesburg Outlets and sprawl made it a new suburb of DC. But from Reston, it’s a 15 min hike and I’m there in no time. I’m reintroduced to my coworkers Ryan and Basil and our lone female video nerd, Avalon is out, but I’ll catch up with her Wednesday. Ryan is a 29 year old guy who is supercool and laid back. He’s built like Andre the Giant, but has the demeanor of Jack Black with some surfer dude thrown in. I like him immediately, moreso after we duel with “Princess Bride” quotes. Every video shop needs a “senior” member and Basil is ours. Just a little north of age 55, he’s an interesting guy. I can’t quite peg him, but I do know he has a wicked sense of humor and has that old guy, I-don’t-have-time-to-deal-with-a-lot-of-crap mentatlity which I dig.

I get the tour of THIS facility and it’s a vast improvement over what it looked like 6 months ago when I interviewed. Then, they were just standing up their studio and edit room and most everything was happening in tiny rooms in the basement. Now we have a pristine edit room with 4 Avid workstations (we’ll all share the room) and a spanking brand new studio space with a three-camera setup and lights and anchor desk and all. Pretty sweet. My actual desk is on the opposite side of the building, so I have two workspaces I can clutter up :) And evidently there is a full fledged plane nose in the back of the building used for training. Gotta see that.

While the building is pretty massive, really it’s just us and the IT/Internet Security folks who comprise the ground floor. Upstairs is a meeting hall/cafeteria and break out rooms cause there’s training here every once in awile. Coming from a building that’s constantly occupied and ginormous at the Agency to this one, the joint feels eerily quiet at times and is a little weird, but I’ll get used to it. And in the basement is a gym, assembled with great pride by the head of security here, so I have no excuses to get in shape now...but I’m sure I can think of two or three. We spend the rest of the afternoon just hanging out and I’m informed tomorrow is when the guy comes here to install our new Unity system (more on that tomorrow), so I can “dress down,” which here is polo shirt and slacks/cargo pants that look decent. And after talking to my boss, I try for a 5 day a week schedule from 10-6:30, which is GLORIOUS to me. I get to still take Emily to school and keep a late schedule, but he urges me to think about the alternative work schedule idea. I say I’ll think about it. But all in all, a good day. It’s definitely going to be interesting.

GENERAL RECAP: I can have my cell phone again (yay!) and have internet, but can’t access any, ANY, personal email accounts (booo!); Monday thru Friday I have to wear shirt and tie (eh), but no jeans ever, not even on Fridays! (booo!); my commute is averaging an hour and I’m trying different routes to see what works -- today was the Toll Road to Reston, then Toll Road from there to Sterling. I think no matter what, it’s going to be a haul, but it’s not too horrible. iTunes, I have a feeling, is going to make a lot of money off me this year.

And dude, I miss having a TV at my desk. How will I know what’s going on with the world?!

DAY 2:
God has a very, VERY good sense of humor or at the very least a flair for irony.

A little background: for those of you not in “The Biz,” Avid is a company that makes editing systems for post production on films and TV. Their high-end products have been used in Hollywood for years and by anyone wanting a high standard for their productions. They also have more affordable products aimed at schools and indie filmmakers, but Apple has beaten them in that arena with their Final Cut system for some years, and Avid is now trying to play catchup.

A great tool if you have an Avid is the Unity system, which is basically a giant hard drive (server) where you can store files and information and share that with any other computers on that server. At my previous job, management was practically stalking us in an effort to GET RID of our Unity system. In their wisdom, they were replacing our Avids with Adobe’s Premiere Pro editing system. Nothing against Adobe’s offering, but I’ll use an analogy we constantly told The Powers That Be in our futile effort to have them not take the Avid away: “You’re basically taking away our Ferrari and giving us an Accord and telling us to go just as fast.”

So imagine my surprise that when I come here, we’re installing a Unity system. And because I’m the only one on the team with experience with it, I’m going to be leaned on to help everyone get up to speed. And to make the irony even more delicious, when I walk in to help with the install who should be running the show but Chip, the same guy who did upgrades to our Unity system when I first got to CIA. I recognize him, he recognizes me, we chat it up...the universe is very small indeed. Chip will be with us the rest of the week for the install and so I spend time catching him up to speed on what’s been going on at The Agency, much to his amazement.

And it’s quite funny going from a super secure environment like the Agency to here where it IS secure, but people look at me funny when I ask questions like, “I can use a credit card?” and “I don’t have to lock up when I leave?” I get a lot of head shaking at some of my questions, but to their credit, they understand where I just came from. Oh, and I did learn this: while I do work for the Federal Air Marshal Service, when talking to the general public about where I work, I should just say TSA (cause I don’t want ANYONE thinking I’m a marshal. Jack Bauer, I ain’t!), but internally I should refer to myself working for FAMS. Nobody respects TSA it seems.

And it isn’t til today I put my finger on the different vibe I get here and at HQ. A lot of The Service is made up of former military and law enforcement, mostly Secret Service (who have come from local police and/or military backgrounds anyway). I must’ve been asked was I former military about 4 times walking the halls at HQ. At the Agency, you got a mix of backgrounds and that made things a little more...”relaxed.” Here I do get a little more rigid feel and I’m warned by all of my team that there are huge egos we bump into, so watch out and don’t be afraid to let my boss Jesse take the hit. Mental note: so it seems I’ll be running into a lot of egomaniacs. Must talk to Jamie Cave for practice :) .

DAY 3:
Chip has us knee deep in Unity system training. At the Agency, we didn’t do any admin and had one of our IT guys be the “custodian” of managing the server. Here we’re all the custodians and while there are benefits to us having the responsibility and power, part of me is worried we may just shoot off our foot one day by accident. Stay tuned.

And my last team member, Avalon, is back. Avalon is a lady same age as me, also cool like Ryan, but is his physical opposite. Tall and slender, she’s always on the go and at times talks so fast, I’m like, “Huh?” She has amazing energy and is clearly leaned on by Jesse for IT stuff and is his go-to person for most things -- a natural second in command, which I find interesting given Basil is older. She defers to him on stuff very respectfully and all, but you clearly get the sense she is the one who knows the most of what’s going down at any given moment other than our boss.

So after a day of being battered with Unity info, my brain hurts and I head home. Fairfax County Parkway has become a viable way to and from work, but darn that Fair Oaks Mall. Traffic is a bottleneck mess at that point and at Reston off the Parkway, but it seems the best way for me to go, especially from Mom and Dad’s house. And I’ve talked with my boss Jesse; I WILL do the alternative work schedule. After talking with Katie, it just made sense to work 9hrs/8hrs-for-one-day and then have a day off during the two-week work period. I liked the way things were (remember me, the guy not a fan of change), but I still get to at least have Emily in the mornings and maybe now a whole day with her. And if we do film another Sapling Pictures masterpiece (Keith, Brian, and I) or I get one of my own projects up and running, now I have some time without using my annual leave. So we’ll see.

And I still miss having a TV at my desk. And March Madness is upon us! Even worse timing on my part!

DAY 4:
More Avid Unity training by my main man, Chip. Before, the guys had been saving footage to hard drives at each workstation and working off of those, and since all the files they were working on depended on which machine they were at, their file management isn’t the best. With the Unity, it almost demands that you’re really descriptive with your stuff and organization of your materials is key. As much as I lamented the amount of paperwork and strict workflow at my last gig, this one is the polar opposite and it looks like I’m going to have to come up with a way to wrangle that. Again, God and irony. He’s laughing at me, I just know it.

And today is Chip’s last day with us. I tell him it was good to see him and that if I do see him again, it’ll be here and not at yet another new place. Chip’s a really good guy and it was great to see a somewhat familiar face in this new place, sort of like an episode of a spinoff series and you have someone from the old series show up. But man, Chip smokes like a chimney and the way he smells after a smoke break is not something I’ll miss.

DAY 5:
So I come in late from a doctor’s appointment and the “On Air” light to the studio is on. No shoots were scheduled, so I totally think this is a gag or maybe someone accidentally hit that switch when they turned on the lights and walk in the door anyway. Imagine my surprise when there IS a shoot going on in the studio! Luckily they were in between takes, and everyone was cool about it, but I’ve now established Rule #1: Believe what you see! After helping out with the taping and all, I go through the gear we have, getting an inventory of what I’m dealing with here. They have some good stuff; not nearly as much as we did at MPG when I first got there, but not bad for a new operation that’s two years old. Basil, Avalon and I mess around on our respective systems, see if there are any bugs from Chips handiwork. It’s Friday and everyone’s just killing time to go home and sure enough, I decide today is my 8-hr day and jet.
So Week 1 is done amazingly and I lived through it. Not much of my morning has actually changed in the time I get up and stuff, but that extra hour time in the car IS a bit different for me. And the people here seem nice, but it is the first week. We still need time to annoy each other. :) But I do miss my folks at MPG. It was very weird Monday not going to Langley as I had every day for the past two years. And I miss joking with those guys, and going to lunch with Greg and Brittany, and talking the latest in movies and Idol with Laureen, Rick, and Stephanie, and bitching about management. It’s definitely weird. I’ve just go to find my rhythm here and I’ll be alright. It is only the first week! Oh, and I get my first trip to Atlantic City in April, so that’ll be a hoot. Then I’ll really get to see what we do.

24 The Conclusion of Season 5

2006-05-25T14:45:00.000-07:00

Ah, it's that time, my friends. The moment we dreaded has finally come and gone--the end of yet another non-stop year of "24." I must admit, what am I going to do for Mondays now? Watch reruns on FX? Borrow friends' DVD collections? Damn straight! Gotta have my Jack Bauer, and January's just to far away! All in all, I'd give this finale a 3.5 star out of five. They hit the right beats for the most part and as I've said before, this was the most consistent season where they've stuck with the main story without too many..."stupid distractions." And the acting performances alone push it almost to a five. Greg Itzin totally deserves to have an Emmy on his shelf next year, and if they need someone to head the petition to get him nominated next year, I'm there. Superb acting by everyone really and it held up the tradition of truly heart stopping moments for some episode cliffhangers (Edgar!). Out of all the finales this year (be on the lookout for my Finale Round Up in the coming days), this one wasn't the best, but it by far wasn't the worst either. SO what did we learn going out with a bang?:

--that coporate sponsorship is alive and well in primetime. Chloe boots up a computer and Cisco Systems displays for like a good five minutes just to let you know what preferred hackers/computer geniuses use. Also during the Palmer funeral, Mike Novik or someone uses a Sprint phone with streaming capability to watch CNN's coverage on TV. You know the real sponsorship deal they should be working on? ADT or freaking Corby to get some really good security on CTU next year. If CTU factors in next year's storyline or anything, I certainly hope there's nothing disasterous going on there. Been there, done that too much.

--Jack is a control freak. We know this of course in the past five years watching our galliant hero face off with terrorists, but my man tells Petty Officer Rooney the EXACT way to filet a dude. I thought showing people how to hotwire cars and pick locks on TV was pushing it. What's the word of the day, class? "Carotid Artery." I bet you thought you'd never save a Russian submarine on your own when you signed up for the Navy, did you Rooney? I do like those moments in the show though because while Jack is a baddass and can take out the Army without blinking, it's good to show how killing and mayhem don't come as easily to some of the folks Jack comes across and are put in these incredible situations.

--RED SHIRT ALERT! Dude with Jack as you're checking out the sub while Henderson is fiddling with the missiles, I'm sorry to tell you, you are dead. Look around. You're a no name, you're with Jack, there are hostiles nearby. You're dead. Hope you've got your fall perfected cause you're going down.

--that killing Henderson closed a great door for them. As being badass #2 on the show, I kind of wish they hadn't killed off Henderson. It would've been great to have him, as part of his pardon deal, have to go in and save Jack. But then again, Henderson did kill David Palmer, and that's a no-no we fans can't tolerate. Justice is a dish best served cold...and boy, did Jack serve him a helping.

--that Chloe at this point doesn't work for anybody but Jack. She might as well change her name to Q and call him James. Jack makes one call to her like, "I'm going after Logan, I need this," and you almost see her shrug her shoulders and throw her arms in the air like, "Oh, why not." I mean, the woman has been doing all this stuff behind everyone's back all day anyway, might as well do this one. Only Jack could inspire such loyalty :)

--we learn that we ARE watching a Fox show and not the WB when Martha and Aaron say goodbye. If it were a WB show, clearly there would've been a long, deep kiss and James Blunt's "You're Beautiful" would've been playing under it as they parted ways perhaps never to meet again. I was so like, "Aw, no kiss! Come on!" but it didn't fit the honorable knight in shining armor Aaron is. She is still married...married to a putz, but married nonetheless. I'm still mad Aaron didn't get to kill more people, but hell, I'm just glad he survived. He's a good character; I hope he pops up next year. Also, Aaron escapes the compound with Mike only to come back with Jack? Sorry, um, I think we're missing the definition of the word "escape" here.

--that Chloe has an ex-husband? And he's British(?)? And he's a womanizing cad? How delightfully juicy. Now here's one of the major inconsistencies of the finale: They take out the submarine that it took 10 minutes of the episode before to capture in 20 minutes, which is so throwaway and you kind of scratch your head why, but we get this great part of Chloe's life with this seemingly cool character and we see him here and when he's dropping off stuff to Jack and that's it?! Bad producers, bad. Let's get more of the husband next year, possibly back with Chloe even though you can clearly see they're wrong for each other.

--the Chloe O'Brien Line of the Week: Martha and Mike Novick know that Jack is coming for the Prez --
Martha: Will he hurt him?
Mike: he says this much nicer, but Mike's line is basically "Jack will f--- that fool up if necessary." The definition of badass, people. You don't have to say what a badass you are, other people do it for you because THEY KNOW.

--that this is something I had a problem with throughtout the season. You're the President of the U.S. I know we're not in the Nixon era anymore, but you mean to tell me that nothing in that room of his was wired for sound, no cameras, no survellience equipment to spy on what's going on? I mean, it helps when you're trying to be a sneaky, underhanded President not to have electronics that could, oh, provide evidence, but I found it interested none of his rooms at the compound were heavily survellienced.

--that a commercial break is all Logan and Martha needed for a "quickie." No, didn't want to really see them "getting down," but man, that's quick! I know you gots stuff to do as Prez, but dang. And Martha's seduction proves that yes, even against our instincts, we men are slaves to the..."other brain." We can't help it. It's stronger than freakin' Kryptonite. Know and learn, females of the world.

--Chloe O'Brien Line of the Week #2:
Chloe to Jack: I don't mean to put added pressure on you, but if you don't get a confession, we'll be arrested for treason. Classic!

--The whole storyline getting the confession from Logan through Martha was handled brilliantly. Some people say they could see it coming a mile away, especially when Jack didn't shoot him, but I'm sorry, I was surprised and loved seeing the smirk on Martha and Mike's faces as they hauled Charles away like a common criminal. Again, I was holding out for someone taking a shot at him and ending his pitiful life, but I can take jailtime. Speaking of which, and I of course haven't mentioned how good he is before, but Itzin was great in his speech to Martha about putting her away in an asylum and drugging her. Viscious and evil, I loved it cause I soooo hated this dude! I like what they did with the Logan character and totally going from this sniveling guy last year to diabolical criminal mastermind way over his head. Well done.

--that at the end, I thought for sure Audrey would buy the farm. Have we killed enough women in Jack's life? Yes. But there was that beat when they were talking in the open I thought for sure someone would take her out. Instead, we get Jack taken out. Kim Raver's starring in a fall show, so it might be the last we see of Audrey, but hopefully they can work it out next year that she can be back.

And that brings us to the end with Jack on a slow boat to China...literally! People doubted me, but I told you, the Chinese would come into play and get our boy back. That dude was adamant last year and didn't believe for a moment Jack was dead, so I knew this season could end no other way, but Ari has a good point about in that highly secure area, four dudes can sneak in, take Jack out, and leave undetected? Ah, but it's that dash of implausibility we love about "24"....okay, it's more like a freakin' pint of implausibility, but it tastes oh so good! And that was a nice touch with the Edgar picture. All in all, a good season and they cleaned house. Can't wait to see who they add to the cast next year and how the heck Jack gets out of this one. I sincerely hope though they have someone like Curtis go in and get him rather than him escaping. I want Jack to rely on someone a little bit...then kick some ass. We also never learn more about some of the loose ends in the story--Wade Palmer, Martha's assistant, just how many more government agents were available to help bad guys escape--but all in all, a very decent finale. Thanks for reading everyone and please check here as I write about stuff OTHER than "24" now ;) Have a great Memorial Day weekend...

-B

24 This Week: 5/15/06

2006-05-16T11:55:00.000-07:00

Three more to go! Three more eps to go and this season of 24 will come to an end. How time flies. DirecTV has this thing called Showcases and one of them was a 2-minute summary of this season so far and has a few clips from the finale, and I've gotta say after watching it, this season has flown by and man, they packed a lot into it. I don't know about the rest of you, but I feel like this season was the best in terms of them presenting a good, straight coherent storyline and sticking to it. I mean, it wouldn't be 24 without the plot twists and turns (Edgar dying, President Logan being the baddie), but in terms of the overall arc of the season and all the things they did to get there, it was very straightforward and not...all over the place as some seasons have tended to be. Last night's episode, not one of my favorites I must say. They save a sub full of missiles as the big gun of the end? I just as well would've had Jack destroying the gas plant as the finale, or even the diplomat plane siutation. I just felt the sub thing was too much to present in just three episodes left. But last night did have some great moments...

--From my boy Cameron's mouth to the writers' ears: Friday we were talking about how would Jack handle Miles' betrayal and destruction of the tape and Cameron says, all Jack is gonna do is grab him by the throat, yell at him, and almost kill him. And lo and behold, that's what happened! I'm just glad they caught Miles and realized it was him, even though they had to let him go so he could hump the President's leg. And did you see how Jack took out the guard Karen told to stop him? One punch in the chest and dude was DOWN. I've gotta learn that....

--Henderson is Jack Bauer version 1.0 I mean, dude thinks like Jack, doesn't give a crap like Jack...he may be one of the best characters created yet for Jack to deal with. I just wish they had made him an out and out villain. That would've been a good battle of wits (he escapes and comes back next year?). And as for him saying he was helping them to obtain the files and stuff: dawg, you're going to tell the guy they're trying to apprehend you've got CTU with you, ask for a gun, and you want Jack to trust you that you're doing what you agreed to? Come on. I'm surprised Jack didn't shoot him on sight after the gun fight.

--The lovers, Aaron and Martha Logan. Ah, love is in the air. She finds Aaron, shoots his captor, and is tending to his wounds. Okay, who else thought they would go there and kiss? I totally thought they'd go there, but I guess with Aaron being all honorable, he wouldn't get all freaky with the still married Martha...but you could see the "unspoken bond" between them. I still have Vegas odds Aaron shoots Prez Logan, despite the tease for next week that shows Jack possibly doing it. On a side note: Keifer's movie "The Sentinel" features a Secret Service agent who is set up and blackmailed due to his having an affair with the First Lady. Coincidence, no? And the Chloe O'Brien Line of the Week goes to Aaron: "You are not a man and you have disgraced the office, CHARLES." I mean, all that was missing was Aaron spitting in his face. To no longer call him the President and give him no respect, you go, Aaron.

--So Bierko has one canister of nerve gas left, I can get with that. But you use it on a submarine? I mean, in that enclosed area, you'll never get all that gas out and you know how it stinks up the upholstery! But seriously, how did they know that submarine was in port there when it wasn't --as far as we know -- part of the original plan? And why do all the bad guys have great HR people? Because I always hire a team that's multitasked in not only chemical warfare, but how to RUN A FREAKIN' SUBMARINE! These guys can do it all. No terrorist plot too big, none too small. I find it amazing. And like Kathy was saying, that poor sub captain. Even if you're talking to Jack on the phone, you're a red shirt waiting to die. My man pokes his head out of the hatch, boom. Don't get next to Jack Bauer, I'm telling you.

--In one weekend, I've seen two "What Would" scenarios. On the West Wing finale, there was "What Would Leo Do?" In 24 last night, it was "What Would David Palmer Do?" Wise men to follow and live by. Something tells me there will be no "What Would George W Do?" ever uttered because that would mean interrupting our TV viewing with a political soapbox speech that could be shown on C-Span in the time it took to reiterate stuff he's said before. Fool! I'm not saying the immigration issue isn't important, but a national TV address? In the middle of sweeps?! To say things you've said already and just looking to ease the tension you, yourself, created? David Palmer would have known the value of not doing that....and the value of All-State Insurance :)

Next week, the stunning two hour season finale. How in God's green Earth are they going to bring Logan to justice without evidence? Will he even live or die (chant with me now: Aaron, Aaron, Aaron)? Will Chloe stop the submarine with her computer LIKE ALWAYS and give Jack the window he needs to save the day? And what happens to Jack? Now that every government agent in the world (thanks to that arrest warrant by the President) and everyone in LA knows he's alive, will the Chinese come knocking? Dude just signed on for a couple more years, so unless we're now called 24: Prison Break II, he's got to get away or be exonerated somehow. Will he and Audrey live happily ever after? And what about that Grey's Anatomy finale? What a let down! :) Until next week!

24 This Week: 5/8/06

2006-05-09T00:46:00.000-07:00

So after waiting for what seems like an eternity again for the new episode, we get the softer side of "24" this week. I must say, I liked it, and I'm a little biased because I like the writer of the episode, Manny Coto. He's cut his teeth on a lot of TV, but Coto was responsible for bringing some humanity to "Star Trek: Enterprise" in its last season, and he brings a lot to this episode where we get the action of landing the plane out of the way from the get go, and then on to personal relationships in the show. Jack and Audrey....Karen and Miles...Logan and Marty...Chloe and--the nearest laptop. :) Some people may think this one was a little slow, but I liked it a lot. But....what did we learn?

--that budget ain't necessarily going to special FX. I don't know, the plane stuff just looked bad to me for a show of "24"'s caliber, but maybe the money is being spent on all these freakin' guest stars this year and not CG. I mean it was decent for episodic TV budgets, but yeah, this show ain't Battlestar Galactica.

--that Jack shouldn't have to repeat himself. When the co-pilot/traitor is giving Jack some lip, Jack gets his gun a little closer to his head as if to say, "Just in case there's some confusion here, I have a gun. It's pointed at your head. Do as I say." That's effective negotiating in my book.

--that I thought at one point "24" would get wacky and it'd be the Marines vs. CTU (Curtis' ground team picking up Jack). Thankfully they realized we've had quite enough "Oh, come on" moments so far, so they gave us a break with this one. Besides, we all know who'd win--CTU agents can't keep a building secure to save their life, but in the field, with Jack Bauer, who can stop 'em?!

--that someone--oh, Miles--needs a BIG timeout. Okay, first of all, if I had a subordinate talk to me the way Miles talked to Karen, whoa nelly, there'd be some bitch slappin' going on! Maybe that's why I work alone, hmmm. But yeah, he demands that she tell him what's going on? She needs the Jack Bauer School of Counterterrorism, especially the class on "Do as I say or people will die, starting with you." And who couldn't see the treatchery from Miles coming a mile away. I didn't know if he was already in on the plot with the President, but I knew in some way, scuzzy Miles would do something underhanded and piss me off even more. Execution at the end of the show for two, please--Miles and President Logan. I do kind of feel like his betrayal of Karen is sort of not in character--he's a weasel but so far had been a loyal weasel--but hey, we need all the villains we can get on this show to keep it chugging for another 3 hours.

--speaking of villains, what's up with the driver of Beirko's transfer detail being in on it and the one eventually to lead to his escape? Come on! Is like every third government agent on the take in this universe? Grant you, we've gotten up the the President being crooked now, but damn, every time you turn around, there's some "inside man" giving a wink and a smile to the bad guy in custody to say, "Don't worry, man, we're going to the Sizzler after we get you out of those cuffs." Hopefully as the show is winding down, we've seen the last of this. Again, whoever's doing these background checks for these employees...we have a serious HR problems in the CTU/government world.

--another TV law: Right before you're ready to kill yourself, if there's not enough time to eat that last great meal, but just enough time for you to reflect, a character will always take a drink of alcohol...always. And it's most of the time a dark liquor, all the better to see on camera (gotta love that aged scotch someone always has stashed). Is it that you want to get sloshed enough to do the deed or we like liquor so much we want that to be the last taste on our lips? You be the judge.

--Great acting by the way of Greg Itzin (Prez Logan). The quiet moments during his walk back to his room after talking to the First Lady...his dialogue with Rocket Romano hinting at suicide...the guy is doing a great job. I must admit, they almost had me thinking he really was going to off himself...but then I looked and there was like 10 minutes left in the show, so I knew SOMETHING was going to happen to stop him :) And great little tender moment with Jack and Audrey as he visits her in the infirmary. I actually felt it was genuine. What can I say, I'm a mushy guy...

--two quotes of the week:
MILES: I'm just doing my job, Chloe.
CHLOE: Well, if your job is to slow things down, you're doing a great job, Miles.

and then when Marty says she'd be impressed with the President's ability to lie if she wasn't horrified that she was married to him. Ouch.

We're in the home stretch now, people! Secretary Heller IS alive after all, so that's one mystery solved. Aaron is tied up and looks like he's been beaten to a pulp. Here's hoping he says, "And I'm going to have relations with your wife," right after he plugs Logan upon his escape :) Jack tries to get the evidence from Henderson after the sabotage, so this is probably the last stand with Robocop--may the best badass win. And I've got to admit, I'm curious now with the tape destroyed how they're going to bring down the President. Unless someone talks, there's no way to get him. But we'll soon find out, same Bat-time, same Bat-channel.

SHAMELESS PLUG OF THE WEEK: http://www.retrojunk.com/
You must, must, must check out this website. It'll mean more to those of us in the 30 and up category, but will be nostalgic for you younger tykes, too. It has a lot of intros from old TV shows and sadly, I have some in my video library I could give them to fill in their blanks. This is your warning: it is highly addictive and once you start watching, you can't stop! Till next week....

24: This Week 4/24-5/1

2006-05-02T10:04:00.000-07:00

I'm baaaaaack! I know, I know...everyone went through withdrawal with no 24 update last week--and I humbly apologize; life got the best of me-- but I'm here and I'm ready to rumble about our good buddy Jack Bauer.

So, where have we been? Jack confides in his former boss, Secretary Heller, who then bogarts him, ties him up and proceeds with his own plan which results in the Secretary taking a spectacular swan dive off a cliff. I've gotta admit, I didn't see that one coming at all. I audibly said, "Whoa," as they cut to the wide shot and that Caddy speeds up to take the leap. I thought he'd maybe do some evasive driving on the road, maybe even he'd get out of the car and defiantly give the middle finger to the guys in the copter, but jump off a cliff? Never. So who wants to take bets now whether he's REALLY dead, or was saved?

We also now have Chloe escaping CTU --which isn't hard to do for the bad guys, so why should it for the good guys--and working out of Bill Buchanon's house. And everyone was right: the best line of the last week was when Chloe basically said, "Your equipment's crap but it's all we've got to work with so we'll deal." President Logan confesses to his sanity-hanging-by-a-thread wife of his misconduct of the day, Aaron our Secret Service hero disappears, and Jack is leavin' on a jet plane and we know he'll be back again, but...will he have the tape recording for evidence?! This brings us to this week and the things we've learned!

--that this week's episode was good for such a bottle episode. I mean, mostly we're dealing with Jack on the plane, Audrey's out of action, and we have good back and forth with Karen Hayes helping out at CTU and that's the show. So good show overall. Not great like the last ones have been, but of course....

--Chloe steals the show. Her taking out the tazer and tagging the drunk dude? BRILLIANT! And not once, but twice! I loved it; I was howling laughing. So the Chloe O'Brien line of the week isn't a spoken line, it's the powerful yet subtle hum of a tazer gun. I love that woman.

--that Jack Bauer is still The Man. Sing to the tune of "The Candyman Can".... who can take out an air marshal/knock him out cold/ take his gun, take his badge and take a plane alone/the Jack Bauer can/that Jack Bauer can....
I mean, I've really got to check if this is possible in the real world, but my man cuts open a panel and takes CONTROL OF A PLANE FROM THE BAGGAGE HOLD. That's the power of Jack Bauer. I do wonder though why he didn't enlist the aid of the air marshal instead of just putting him in the hold, but I guess it was easier than worrying about trusting him. After all, Jack did whip his ass and I don't think air marshal's take that too kindly :) Jack don't need no backup! And if I'm the pilot, I'd watch my back as I'm trying to give some lame excuse of a cramp to unlock the door to the cabin. But we are dealing with TV IQs, not real ones, so I understand we must have some dramatic effect.

--speaking of the plane, I don't know about you, but when they were doing the whole Jack to Chloe to get the pilot to not decompress the hold and running through Karen at CTU, it was a little reminiscent to me of the trash compactor scene in the original Star Wars. Chloe as C-3PO: "Curse my rusty innards, I can't save Jack in time!"....I mean, it was just so apparent I started shouting, "Shut down all the planes on the detention level!" If you don't remember this scene, or think this joke has run its course, please skip ahead...

--that the First Lady has taken the one way trip to Looney Toon Town and she ain't comin' back. Poor woman. She gets faith in her husband, he destroys it...she seeks out comfort from her Secret Service man Aaron, but her husband has him taken out....it's a wonder she held onto the sanity she had to begin with. And Jean Smart is brilliant in this episode conveying a woman who's totally on the edge of losing it fully. Again, Emmy nomination in her future, gotta be. And how cold is Logan? She calls to ask him why he didn't confide in her in the beginning and he snaps back, "'Cause you crazy, ho! Why am I going to tell you anything when you're a drop away from drinking the Jesus Juice?" That was just mean and gave you insight into how Logan really feels about her. Two things have to happen: either the First Lady gets to take a shot at Logan or Aaron gets to plug him and stand over him saying, "AND I'm taking your woman!"

--And that Miles is a W-E-A-S-E-L, pure unadulterated sniveling toadie. He follows orders given by the President that are clearly weird unconditionally, but then Karen does something out of line and he calls Mike Novick?! Jerk! Oooh, I hate that Miles. Since we now have Rocket Romano from E.R. (welcome Paul McCrane to the "24" family), can we have a helicopter cut off Miles' arm and fall on him in the medical bay as well?

So only four more hours left, people! Can you believe it's gone by so soon? I can't. And I know they can't tie up everything, but I want to know the final fate of Evelyn, the First Lady's aide who gave up Jack's position to Henderson. Is Aaron dead or just detained? Wayne Palmer has to show up when President Palmer's body gets to DC, so what's the end for him? Will we find out who the heck Paul McCrane and his dark suited cronies are and how he got the President of the US to do all this crazy mess? Will Curtis get to be head of CTU so his life can be ruined? Ooh, maybe Chloe! Can you imagine Chloe running CTU? Priceless. And holy Snakes On A Plane...Jack has to avoid being shot down out of the sky? And here's a thought: a plane full of diplomats--did anyone see a Chinese diplomat? Cause if so, our boy Jack has bigger problems....

24 This Week: 4/17/06

2006-04-18T15:44:00.000-07:00

Dude! Okay, so the show is BACK! "24" is kicking on all cylinders again and last night's episode demonstrated again why we keep tuning in each year. Great balance of intrigue, drama, action, conflict...tell your friends! Here's my random thought in watching last night's show: Remember when Startac cell phones came out and they were the hot thing and you saw them then appear in every TV show/film known to man? Now Razors have taken over. I can hear the commercial now: "When the leader of the free world wants to make clandestine dealings to known terrorists to secure oil for America, there's only one phone he'll use. The Motorola Razor: now in silver and black...and pink. Get one and destroy the world today!" Gotta love product placement. :) And now...

What have we learned this week:

--That again actor Gregory Itzin was PERFECT as a choice for President Logan. We think he's a boob, then we think he's diabolically evil, and now you see a little of the...the best word I can come up with is "cowardice" creep back in. He's definitely more manipulative and savvy than we thought, but you see the side now where he's not sure his little machinations will hold up and how long until he's found out and a goner. And the scene with Mike Novick where he's questioning him about his search for Jack--I honestly didn't know if Logan might do something to Mike. There were a couple of times I thought he'd grab something and beat him (okay, just knock him out, but he's crazy, right? :) It's a testiment to what Itzin's done with the character that you actually think he can be a man of action now; Logan's got some chops, he's dangerous! But great acting job. I wonder if they knew this in casting him last season, where they would take Logan and that's why they chose him.

--that Jack Bauer is, once again, The Man with a capital MAN and you shouldn't go against him. Exhibit A: Secretary Heller taking Jack and Audrey out once they present the evidence. HELLO! As pointed out by my homeboy C. Young, Heller worked with Jack, trusted Jack, knows Jack is the man, yet goes against his advice and does the complete opposite in confronting Logan. Come on, man! You've been a politician long enough to know you guys can't be trusted! And that Logan will hold onto his power no matter what rather than "step down quietly." According to the scenes from next week, Jack tells Heller he feels betrayed by him and rightly so. Let's see a little Jack Bauer justice go on where Heller is concerned. And Exhibit B: Jack is James Bond, McGyver, and freakin' Chuck Norris put together. My man burns his wrists to get out of bindings, subdues the guard, gets in a firefight he survives, and saves the life of the woman he loves as she's bleeding to death. This is after a day of running out of a gas building where chemicals are being set off, evading arrest a gazillion times, surviving mutiple firefights, and surviving possible exposure to a nerve gas in CTU. Jack for President, baby....

--that speaking of bindings, TV prisoner rules are still in effect. In the history of television drama, there are just stupid things you have to do as a captor in dealing with your intended victim-- reveal the whole of your nefarious plot to them...not kill them immediately upon telling them your nefarious plot...not make sure there is nothing the prisoners can use as a means of escape (especially frisking them and taking any knives or even paperclips away) ...leaving the most inept guards you have on staff to guard said prisoners so they can subdue them and get away. And so we have last night, the dreaded guard peeks in to check on prisoners then stands watch. NOOOOOO! You always keep your eyes on the prisoners! What else do you have to do? Seriously. There may be that commando unit coming to save them, but guess what? They're coming to save the prisoners, you know where they're going. You either stand in the cell/empty room/torture room with the prisoner and watch them all the time or at least one guard watch them through the door constantly and the other look out for any rescue attempt. Ah, gotta love TV prisoner rules...

--that Audrey's having a freakin' day from hell. The love of your life returns from being dead, you think he's killed, you're tortured, and now this nutjob has cut your artery and you're bleeding to death. But Audrey is a quality woman: she yells for Jack to forget about her and keep the evidence--and honestly I didn't know which he'd do--but to make that kind of sacrifice...she's been reading my blog, too :) Jack, if she also unlocks the door for you as you come around to the driver's side in a car, that Audrey's a keeper. When you disappear yet again at the end of this season, you'd better take her with you.

--that the Red Shirt Death Tally is up to, what, 100 now in the course of this season alone? Heller's man is in the same position Jack is under the wheel of a plane in a firefight, but he gets shot. Jack's unharmed. People, again, read the blog....if you are with Jack Bauer, and you're not a character we love or love enough we'll miss when they die, you are history. Don't even pull out the gun and shoot back or run to the car where you and Jack will supposedly make a getaway. Accept your fate. You're a goner.

--The "twang" soundtrack is back and it, indeed, does sound like a soundtrack for Chloe. Don't like it. Please return to the haunting melodies and occasional maracas when there's tension. Don't get fancy.

--that Chloe would make the worst magician in the world. The slight of hand in taking Miles' key card as he left her cell? Come ON! He couldn't see that?! I mean, I guess I should be glad she didn't do the cliche of coming on to him or anything, but this was so blantantly bad and obvious. But it got Chloe out of the cell, and that's all that counts, right? And was it just me, or did I sense sparks when she reached Bill Buchanon's house? Hmmm, Bill and Chloe sittin' in a tree....

--and speaking of sittin' in a tree, Martha Logan got awfully close to Aaron when she was trying to get him to tell her why Heller was there. "You can trust me, Aaron...you know that." I tell you, that Martha Logan's a naughty little minx playing her two men like she's doin'. Secret lovers, yeah, that's what they are/trying so hard so they can't see/but we both belong to someone else...

--Chloe O'Brien Line of the Week: when Jack says, "Our government has no integrity...." and then pauses and finishes with the rest talking about Logan. Hmmm, you think they might be trying to say something there underneath about our current real-life administration? Hmmmm....

So next week, what the heck happened to Aaron in meeting Martha? The way they shot it made it seem like we were watching someone watching Martha, but then....nothing happened other than her finding the phone. Has our favorite Secret Service agent gone too far and gotten taken out? And I brought this up to peeps, and the lovely Laura C. had theories as well when we talked, but what do you think happened to Evelyn, the First Lady's aide, after she told Henderson where Jack was? They still haven't answered that this week. I think he killed her and her daughter. He's not the type to leave loose ends, but I am curious. I hope they address it at some point before the end. And now that he's disgraced, what can Heller do now? And I've got to say, a hero is only as good as his adversary and in Henderson, they've created a great villain for Jack. The only thing that could make it better is if they could really go at it in a physical matchup [but come on, for real, Keifer would kick Robocop's ass], but as far as minds, Henderson has been Jack's equal and then some. Cutting Audrey to slow Jack down as he escaped? Brilliant! No one since Nina Myers has there been someone more diabolical and Jack's equal. I'll shed a tear when Jack plugs him full of lead :) Next week, come on, get here soon! It's gettin' good, I can't wait!

Oh, and blatant plug of the week: for those of you who tuned in Sunday night to see Grey's Anatomy and were greeted with "What About Brian," I hope you gave it a shot. It actually is pretty good. It airs on Mondays 10pm and it's been described as the male Felicity, and I can see that, but in watching it, I think they totally capture what it's like for young couples (and the obligatory single friend) in their late 20s/early 30s. I can see each of my friends in each of the characters. I know I have a lot of TV, too, and don't wanna add onto the plate, but this one is worth it....

24 This Week: 4/10/06

2006-04-10T23:26:00.000-07:00

Ooooh, it's getting good now! This was another typical filler/exposition episode, but I felt it was a superior one. This shows they can do those epiosodes in an intriguing way where, in the past, the episodes have been kind of boring if no one died we loved or there wasn't flamethrowers. Come on people! We know 24 is never boring! And what about that President Logan? Not since Edward Norton in "Primal Fear" have I been as impressed with a performance where a character acts one way and then turns a corner another way. Props to actor Gregory Itzin, you snowed me and are playing the duality to a "T." I'll say it: they played me, they played us. The creative team made Logan so utterly incompetent in the beginning of the season, there was no way he could be the bad guy, but now that we've turned that corner, they're showing a little of the bumbling facade to everyone else, but now letting us in on the true nature of the Prez. I'm still sort of calling bull--- on them making him the villain, but this week's episode did a lot to lead me on the path of believability. Now....

What have we learned this week:

--That CTU has finally gotten smart and gets sneaky....but it's actually Homeland Security AND they're getting sneaky about catching Jack. Finally someone gets that oh, he LOVES AUDREY. AUDREY WILL LEAD US TO JACK. So I see, it takes a new bunch of people not affiliated with being a clandestine anti-terrorist agency to act like spies. Go figure.
I do like, however, that Audrey gets sneaky on her own and puts the tracker on the truck. Nice touch.

--we've learned how to properly rob a bank. So all you kids out there a little strapped for cash, here's what you do: go on the web, find out the president of a really nice bank you like, follow him home, don't listen to that hogwash about he can't access the bank after hours, get him to let you in, and voila, you have access to mas moola! It's so easy! Dear God, I hope in reality it is not that easy and that the writers took a little artistic license there. But the first news report I hear from Podunk, Iowa, about Johnny trying a bank heist scheme he saw on "24," I'm saying I told you so.

--that Miles really is beginning to annoy the hell out of me and become my new most hated character on 24. These creative guys are good. They do the unimaginable and make Logan interesting and know they have to fill the Well of Incompetent Jerks with a new guy..."Hey, let's make Miles a jerk!" someone bellows at the writer's table. Brilliant. Now I want Chloe to take Miles out, ASAP.

-- Quote of the week #1: Aaron after the First Lady asks him if he's alright-- "I'm just a little battle worn, ma'am." And that look she gave him after he said that? Looks like she wants to tend to those wounds, soldier! But oh, didn't it make you squirm when she and the Prez were getting all hot and heavy!? I thought Aaron had her for sure, but now that Logan doesn't look like the dope she thought he was, the First Lady's got a jones for her man again. Power...chicks dig the power.

--that Jack doesn't go anywhere without that bag he's had since he returned to the "real" world. I mean, what is he, Felix the cat? Holy utility belt, Batman! He pulls out from his bag just the right thing to disrupt a magnetic alarm?! Come on! What the hell else is in that thing? Hell, why don't we just whip out the Tardis http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TARDIS and let's just jump to the end of the season already if that's all it takes! Jack's The Man and all, but honestly....

--Quote of the week #2: you gotta have one from Chloe, the Originator of "24" quotes: As Miles confronts her coming out of the bathroom-- "If you want the details, I'll right you a report." Priceless. Gotta love that little spitfire.

--that the creative team also upholds another tradition in the annals of "24"--the You've Got To Be Kidding Me moment. Ah, let's take a trip down memory lane...Teri Bauer getting amnesia; the cougar chasing Kim through the hills of LA; take your pick of moments in Season 3: the whole prison escape thing, Chase having a daughter, Chase's hand being chopped off; and last year, Jack holding up a gas station to maintain a cover. Ladies and gentleman, I give you this season's You've Got To Be Kidding Me moment....when Evelyn falls and knocks herself unconscious. Grant you, they may pull a better YGTBKM (man, that's a long acronym) moment out of their butts before this season ends, but who among you didn't slap your head silly when the woman badly limps to her whimpering child in the bathroom, only to crack her head wide open on the hotel table? Exactly. The collective groan you heard across the 24 viewing nation was at that exact moment. Stupid. You could see it coming a mile away and it was just handled poorly, poorly, poorly. No offense to the actress playing Evelyn, but physical stunts--if that was even really her and not a stuntperson--is not your thang. Bad, just bad.

--and Quote #3, the piece de resistance: the bank prez held hostage weighs going outside and surrendering or hanging with Jack--"I'll take my chances with you." Normally a wise decision, my friend, but alas, you are what's known as a red shirt. You're not a major character that we care too much you have to live, nor will mourn greatly if you die, and you're near Jack Bauer. Your fate is inevitable. Rest well knowing you are helping Jack and Wayne to avenge President Palmer...who you'll be meeting soon...

I don't know about the rest of you, but didn't you think the music in this episode was stupid and distracting? It got all Mission Impossible, guitar twangy in this episode and it was cheesy as hell. I could see them maybe using it as a theme for Chloe when she was doing her thing, but it was all throughout the show and it didn't work for the kind of show "24" is. I get that kind of crap from Alias, I don't need it in Jack Bauer-land, too.

So now Audrey's daddy is getting in the mix! Aw shucks! And it looks like I'll get my wish after all: either way, Logan's going down with impeachment OR my other fantasy is that Aaron will take a 9mm to Logan gangsta style, and as the President is lying on the ground dying, Aaron lordes over him to say, "AND I'm takin' your woman!" That would be...genius :)

24 This Week: 4/4/06

2006-04-04T22:22:00.000-07:00

Okay, so for some time now I've been recording the episodes to DVD for a friend so he can catch up and watch the show since he has two kids and is usually busy on Mondays. Well, after this week's ep, I'm glad I do it, 'cause I might ask for 'em all back! Is it just me or is everyone baffled at the turn of events in the last minute of the show!? I mean, they did what "24" does: keep us guessing, throwing us curveballs and cliffhanger endings. But I must say, this one left me feeling...confused? Bamboozled? Hoodwinked? Led astray?

So you mean to tell me that all along, bumbling Prez Logan is...really evil? And not just quasi evil. He's the real deal it would appear. I have a hard time with this. It's not because of his thoroughly convincing ability to seem totally inept (which is damn good) but why this plot twist from the creators? I mean, it makes sense because the VP is so obviously slimey, the villain has to be the Prez cause he's the last person we suspect. But I'm confused about all the events we've witnessed so far and how involved Logan is. Cummings never knew Logan was the head enchilada orchestrating everything? I mean, there are a lot of bad guys between them and the only one who really seems to know the Prez is involved is Henderson, but I hope they pull out a big ole roadmap of the show so far this season and explain everything. I normally like subtle hints in my shows, but they're going to have to hit me with a sledgehammer to make me understand how releasing of nerve gas by the Russians, an attempted assasination of the Russian president, Palmer being killed (moment of silence) were all orchestrated in some way by Barney Fife Logan. And why? To get to martial law? Some other agenda we don't know yet? Well, the episode itself wasn't all that riveting, but that ending makes things VERY interesting.

What have we learned this week:

-- that at least two characters read my blog! Aaron and Wayne promptly expouse the Bruce Philosophy of Bad Guys to the First Lady's aide when she stupidly thinks they're going to give her her daughter back and let her walk once she hands over the evidence. The quote of the week is when Aaron, I think, says, people like that just don't do those sorts of things; she knows too much. Ah, at least someone listens...

-- that since we've been without Logan for a couple of episodes, the part of creep-idiot-annoying-dick has been nicely played by Miles, the right hand of the director of Homeland Security. If anyone looks like they have a stick up their butt and you would love Jack to ram it just a little bit more to put this dude out of his misery, it's this joker. He's got all of Chloe's bad personality ticks (bad people skills, attitude), but none of her charm. I hope Bill Buchanon takes a good swing for the fences on him. Speaking of which, I know things are hectic, but Audrey can't pull Bill aside for two minutes and explain why she signed the order to run him under the bus? I mean, come on. Now he thinks she's a beeyatch and is petty cause he had her tortured...which, if you look at it, that's a pretty darn good excuse, no?

--That when Miles first comes to Audrey and presents the paper, the response she REALLY wanted to give him as she left (and this was a great acting moment by Kim Raver): "If I didn't have shite shoved down my veins by Torture Boy 5 minutes ago and my man almost die in a fiery blaze of toxic chemical smoke, I'd take that piece of paper and shove it where the sun don't shine!" The writers went with a restrained, but forceful, speech. I would've went another way. :)

--Smooth Move #1: when Jack simply comes up on the first guard, shoots him in the back, and swiftly looks down at his PDA. I mean, the man has killed so many people, he sees them as interrupting his PDA time with Chloe and Audrey. That Jack...say it with me, people, Jack for President.

--Smooth Move #2: belongs to, who else, but Jack again when he kills the one guard and takes time to pull out a knife, knows where to get to the wires on the walkie talkie, and distorts it enough Henderson can't tell it's him when he answers him! I mean, come on! That's genius! I would've pulled a Han Solo moment ["Uh, everything's fine here, situation normal, we're fine...how are you?"] but Jack knows what to do. I may say screw James Bond now that Daniel Craig is playing him and Jack Bauer be my new hero...

So next week, it doesn't seem like we get TOO many answers, but we definitely will be looking at Logan differently, won't we? I can't wait to see how we get out of this one by the end of the season, kids, but it looks like I might get my Presidential impeachment after all!

I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but it's so good, I'll do it again!: if you haven't been doing so, check out the 24 site on Fox. They have a "Research" section that gives a brief real-life history lesson on some aspect prominent in that particular show. They've had one on chemical warfare, how martial law can be enacted, all sorts of stuff. And check it out for the previous seasons, too. Educational and entertaining! No wonder "24" is, to quote Randy Jackson, A HOT ONE, DA BOMB! (that was for you, Laura C. :)

The Five Heartbeats

2006-03-28T01:05:00.000-08:00

** NOTE: below is written as if I were really writing to Fox Home Video...who knows, maybe I really will, but it's mainly just a rant :)

Dear Sir or Madam:

Hello, my name is Bruce Milton. I'm writing to you today about a movie in your film library that you may or may not know about and how you've messed it up. The movie is called The Five Heartbeats.

I'm 32 years old, so the 90's were my teenage years. I remember movies especially of that time period and how there was a new black Renaissance in filmmaking due to movies like "Boyz N The Hood," "New Jack City," and "Menace II Society." But in the midst of all those action-heavy, very violent films, there were a few that were different and broke through, received just as well, but not as talked about. The Five Heartbeats is one of them. The movie tells the story of five friends who form an R&B singing group and, through the decades, go through various trials and tribulations both together and as individuals. It's wonderful in the way it makes you feel you're a part of the group and get to share in their rise to fame...and their eventual downfall as is typical of a lot of musical acts. Directed by Robert Townsend (who stars, co-wrote, and produced the film as well), it very much plays as his love letter to the doo-wop and Motown groups he--and I--grew up listening to and gives us insight on what it was like for entertainers then and pretty much in the industry now.

So what's my problem with you? Why did I say you've "messed it up?" Well, in 2002, you FINALLY, finally released the film on DVD, much to the delight of its fans. It was no huge collector's edition set or anything; you just gave us a prepackaged featurette shot at the time of the movie, a trailer, some bio on Mr. Townsend, pretty nice anamorphic transfer and clean up of the film, and that's it. But that's okay. I understand that the way things are going now, sometimes barebones DVDs have to be put out just so the public can have the opportunity to even see a film, because most places only sell/rent DVDs anymore, unless you own the original VHS. I bought this DVD hoping and praying someday you'd realize you should revisit this title and give it the treatment it deserves.

Flash forward to a couple of months ago, January of this year, and you bring joy to Mudville--you release a new version. And not just any version, a 15th Anniversary Special Edition! Hallelujah! You heard our prayers! I'm thinking that I've got the best the studio has to offer on this set, with Fox's record of doing very good collector's editions of DVDs. Alas, you supremely disappointed me. Not only do we get the featurette that was on the first disc, but the new featurette that's touted on the back cover? It's nothing more than chopped together bits from that featurette and some older interview footage! Actually, it's easier for me to say the things you did do right: the behind the scenes stuff on the music, the filmmaker's mindset, and deleted scenes were on point. And thanks so much for including the soundtrack with the purchase of the DVD; I finally can toss out my cassette tape. But you mean to tell me you couldn't do a retrospective of this movie? You couldn't go back and interview Mr. Townsend about a movie that was far superior to anything he made after that point and I'd like to think is his crowning achievement? You couldn't interview many of the actors now who were in the movie, who have gone on to much bigger things since this was made? This movie practically made Leon's career! Harry Lennix is currently co-starring in the hit "Commander in Chief!" Michael Wright got leading roles in major movies! You still have pioneers like Diahann Carroll around, could've done a retrospective on Harold Nicholas of the Nicholas brothers who just recently passed away! For God's sake, Kennan Ivory Wayans co-wrote this thing and his insight on how that went for he and Mr. Townsend back in the day to get this made and how he feels about it now looking back are surely worth an interview!

The Five Heartbeats is by no means what I consider a perfect movie. I still have problems in the third act when the group hits the 1970s and breaks up, and all the reconcilliation and stuff happens way too fast for me. But it is a beloved movie. It is a great movie. It deserved better than the treatment you gave it. As a filmmaker, I'd almost say I'd have done the legwork on these interviews for free because I love this movie so much and I know others do, too. We as fans deserve more than what you gave. This is not to say, however, that you should do a third DVD release of this film. The only thing worse than doing a "special edition" injustice is to repeatedly do different editions of a film, gouging the public for more money of a disc they already own and thought was the end-all-be-all version. My point is, we understand if you want to get out that barebones DVD to get the film out in the public water. But when you sit down and do a special edition of a DVD, or something as illustrious as an "anniversary edition," put some effort into it. Make us relive why we loved that particular movie while giving us some new insight into it to make us that more appreciative. Make it an event. Don't get lazy and sloppy and think we'll just take anything. Because eventually, we won't.

Thank you.

24 This Week: 3/27/06

2006-03-28T00:21:00.000-08:00

Okay, so perhaps this is the second time this season no episode has been more anticipated, as we finally find out...bum, bum, bum... if Audrey's a traitor--deal or no deal! (sorry, had to do that :)

And you know of course this has to be one of my favorite episodes this week as we not only continue the tradition of good "24" storytelling, but....no President Logan, yay!!! I know I heap loads and loads of venom on the poor guy, but honestly, you know you want to put him on a one-way trip into the woods with Dick Cheney, too. Don't deny it ;) So now, without further adieu, what have we learned this week!:

--that I had the Full Metal Jacket line "Let me see your war face" playing in my head as they did that close up on Jack as he realized he was going to have to interrogate the hell out of Audrey. I thought for sure he'd do things that would scare the beejeezus outta that girl and their love would be ruined, but evidently you only choke the ones you love and they shared a tender kiss after he got enough out of her to believe she was innocent. Moments like the game face show what a terrific actor Keifer is, although I will admit that in watching the preview during the commercial break for his new movie "The Sentinel" where he plays a Secret Service agent, he does a lot of the Jack Bauer yelling and pointing a gun threateningly at people. But he does it SO well!

--that we get a spotlight on a background character in Burke, the interrogator, in this episode. We don't learn where's he's from or that he likes cocoa and Neil Diamond, but we get hints that he, too, comes from the Jack Bauer school of badass-ness--just the J.V. team, not Varsity. And I mean, come on, let's face it, if your job was to cause people pain all the time and that's all you did, you wouldn't be all warm and fuzzy anyway. And now that's the second time we've seen a CTU agent be the one in the hot box with Burke (three if you count Spencer). I know being in there would make me think twice about being a double agent, that's for sure. And Burke gets to show off a little: In a "I'm not fallin' for no banana in my tailpipe moment," Burke whips out that tazer gun pretty quick on Jack when he resists handing Audrey over like he knew there'd be a problem. Now THAT'S how you handle Jack Bauer if you want to take him down. Gotta know that the man WILL take you down if you give him some resistence and prepare accordingly. Generally, we learn though, when Burke is involved, there is no fun for you.

--we learn that the people at the gas plant haven't learned anything from the mechanic dude: The bad guys will kill you, period. They don't care. That's why they're called--everybody now--bad guys. They will not spare your life or the lives of your friends/coworkers/partners/what have you. You're kidding yourself thinking they will let you go when you've done whatever they want you to do. Don't do what they want and maybe save some lives. You're a goner anyway. But hey, there's no drama then in the story and we can't have Jack save the day with like zero seconds to spare.

--we learn that we've got a new freak girl in town. Okay, so Bill casually touches your arm and he's assaulting you? I knew her gooey story about the nutjob from Homeland Security harrassing her couldn't go without some hitch. I hope all Chem majors aren't that kooky! Now she looks like a looney and Chloe backed her. Now all we need is for not only Homeland to take over CTU, but Buchanon to be hit up with sexual harrassment charges. Again, it does not pay to be head of CTU.

--I know I wasn't the only one yelling at the TV, "Don't kill Aaron, please don't kill Aaron!" as rockets blazed at he and Wayne Palmer. The guy is good and we've lost too many soldiers already. Plus, he and the First Lady have to get it on (insert '70s porno music here) before the end of the season. Oh, and is it just me, but if I had a rocket launcher, I'd aim at the biggest freakin' target out there, one that would blow sky high if I hit it--the car? No, I'm going to be silly and make the little men dance in the mud and have a chance to drive away, totally missing them with my huge, huge, rockets. Ah, television...

Chloe O'Brien line of the week: "I guess I'd better not make any mistakes." [Chloe looks at her incredulously] "Yeah."

And here's my patriotic soapbox of the week: Chloe spewing out those stats to Jack in the helicopter as they approaced the plant--about telling the pilot to take a certain position coming in and the intel about how many guards posted, etc--made me think yeah, the guys like Jack get all the admiration and glory, but it must be tough as hell to be an analyst because people's lives depend on the intel you give them. If it's wrong--as we've seen on a global war scale--it screws up everything and people may die. And these people are real, so next time you bump into a government drone who either is an analyst or works with some in our fair town, give them some props because really, they do a hell of a job and I know they're not getting a TV series out of it...well, maybe Chloe would :)

So next week: does Jack survive (come on, really, you don't have to tease us); how is Bill going to lead an uprising against Homeland Security...I mean, he really could've used the Hobbit's (Samwise) help in that one; now that the main plot of the canisters has been foiled, what's the obvious-but-not-so-obvious other plotline we've missed so far that will end the season; what the hell does Wayne Palmer know that's so important he's jacking up the First Lady's assistant (disturbing amount of violence toward women this season by the fellas); will we be lucky and not get another does of President No Balls--er, I mean, Logan? All these and many more questions, next week on 24!!!!

24 This Week: 3/20/06

2006-03-20T23:34:00.000-08:00

First, I've got to get this random rant out:
Okay, I'm watching Sportscenter and there's this new Hooters ad...ladies reading this, don't turn away yet! So this Hooters ad comes on and it's where they're advertising they have crab legs for 7.99 a pound. One perky little lady motivates the other perky little ladies to go out and sell them. Later on, the perky motivator doesn't understand why they're not selling more of the crab legs and one of the others comes up and says it's too expensive. You see, in all their giddyness, the girls have been weighing customers and charging 7.99/pound by how much THE CUSTOMER weighs! Isn't that hilarious!? NOT!

I don't know whether I should laugh or cry about this commercial. One part of me wants to take them to task for perpetuating the stereotype of their restaurant and the women who work there, but the other part of me applauds them for reveling in who they are and their "image." I know, I'm getting all philosophical over freakin' Hooters. I'll stop right now....

I don't know, is it just me or did it seem to take forever for Monday to get here? It seems like we haven't had "24" in ages for some reason. But it's here and I've got to say....I liked it.

It was a marked improvement over last week's show. And yes, folks who were naive enough to think it couldn't be so, they killed off the Tone-ster. Tony Almeida, may you happily be reunited with your wife. Jack WILL avenge you! :)

So no, there were no fancy smancy explosions this week-- Aaron didn't shoot out any flamethrowers-- and no one died a horrible or honorable death, but the end delivered on what "24" has been known for...the last 2 minutes of the show. But now on to the details....

What did we learn this week...

-- That this week it was at 3 minutes into show-proper (after the "Previously on 24" stuff) that I uttered that phrase that pays, "You are such a frackin' idiot." Yes, that's right folks, it took no time at all for our resident President Logan to rattle my cage. Dude, martial law didn't work for Bruce Willis in "The Siege," why is it going to work for you? (See "The Siege" by the way if you haven't in a while. While it sort of takes the whole NY-under-martial-law thing a little over the top, it's actually more topical now in a post-911 world with its internment of Middle Eastern people. And great performances abound with Tony Shaloub, Annette Bening, and Mr. Denzel Washington. Rent it today!)
But I digress...So Logan can't see the shifty-eyed Vice Prez totally making his play for power. The man looks like a humanoid snake and he trusts him. I smell disaster coming on, which is good for me cause then maybe it'll get this yo-yo out of office.

--Once again, people do not know who the f--- they're dealing with when they deal with Jack Bauer. German agent drops out of the sky (by the way, my "Lost" folks, wasn't it good to see Desmond again? We wondered where ya went, you nutty guy!) and says he's not helping Jack b/c it'll compromise his operation. Dude, Jack should've bitch slapped him right there, but he played it cool, secret agent man to secret agent man. I am sort of disappointed they did the whole dissolved disc thing because Jack is many things, but he is not a liar, but as we know, everything in this show happens for a reason. Something tells me this is not the last we see of a pissed off Desmond and he has a role to further play.

--which leads me into another common theme we have for "24"...the show sets up that so many people are out to get Jack that, by the end of the season, we don't know who will "take him out" (I put that in quotes because we all know you can't REALLY kill Jack Bauer...right?) So now we have Desmond pissed off at Jack, Homeland Security chica not liking the food Jack's servin', President Logan may still in some way sell out Jack to save face, and the Russian peeps running around with the gas who helped in framing Jack in the first place. A rogue's gallery any super bad ass would be envious of. Oh, and I forgot the Chinese who, if they find out Jack's alive, will send him somewhere to be very, very painfully tortured for a long, long time.

--and we learn in the ending that Audrey may be in on the terrorist activity. I'm sorry, I truly did not see that one coming. Man, Jack's taste in women truly, truly sucks; it nearly rivals the efforts of internal security at CTU. Maybe the woman from two seasons ago (I forget the character name, but Sarah Wynter played her) is the only woman in his life that hasn't betrayed or put him in crazy, silly danger. http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0944077/photogallery-scrapbook-0 I've got to admit, I can't wait to see how they spin this one, cause they either have to plausibly get Audrey off the hook, but keep us guessing that maybe she really is a bad guy, or she is as evil and diabolical as Nina Myers, and THAT was good television.

There was no winner in the Chloe O'Brien Best Line of the Week Award. Zip. I didn't get one good one from even Chloe this week's show. If you have a fav line from the show this week, please share. Speak up, America!

So next week, the thrill is gone for Jack and Audrey if that choke-hold in the preview was any indication...Bill still has to prove CTU has what it takes to find the gas...the bad guys make their move, but looks like CTU may be there in time to stop them...and what the hell is so important Peter Weller is running down Wade Palmer before he can talk to Aaron? I mean, I'm stumped about that one, too. How freakin' prescient was President Palmer? He knew Cummings was bad and evidently he's got something on the gas and/or Peter Weller. Damn, Palmer was good. Like I said, this week not big on boom boom, but definitely good with the intrigue. It kept me watching and hopefully you, too.

Also, here's a shameless plug, but she gives me love on her site, and I'm happy to do it on mine: my buddy Sue has a blog on Blogger.com, and she's a waaaay better writer than me. Read on as she waxes poetic on mostly movie reviews, but other musings as well. You can catch her at:
http://www.suedisco.blogspot.com/

24 This Week: 3/13/06

2006-03-14T16:26:00.000-08:00

Okay, so after the harrowing events of last week's two hour extravanganza of the non-stop season of "24," the thought is that this week's episode would keep the pace and live up to what those two hours built up. Um, not so fast.

I've had many conversations about this, and I'm sorry, I've got to put the hater hat on and say this episode wasn't that good. I can be a big guy and admit maybe the things they did in the two hour blitz raised the bar a little too high and because this episode wasn't as good, I'm being unduly negative, but it just wasn't that good to me. I will admit, it's a filler episode. The writers dug themselves in this hole of having CTU attacked, people dying--especially poor Edgar--and made good drama. The following episode had to be them getting out of this dramatic situation. I just didn't think it was all that and done particularly well. That said, there's still stuff we learned:

What did we learn this week:
-- Jack is still The Man. Out of everyone stuck in the room, who did everyone listen to? Who was the only one willing to hold his breath and go through the wall to get to the computer? Jack Bauer. Recognize. Just make the man a statue already and his birthday a national holiday.

--That said, Peter Weller's no joke either. Another problem I had with this episode is the old trick of a super badass faking his vital signs only to rise up and wreak havoc on unsuspecting folks. Weller looks like he's in a coma, and has been injected with this horrible drug forever, and pops up and escapes. Too easy. I mean, he's a badass cause he got the jump on Jack and can resist torture, but come on. I hope they catch him cause he shouldn't be able to get too far.

--And on that note, when you want to kill somebody, make up your mind before you wield the weapon. Tony, I love ya, but man, if you're going to hover over a superbadass, use the needle, don't hesitate. We see what can happen. So boys and girls, when choosing to kill someone you think is unconscious either: A) knock that fool in the head and make sure he's out and THEN use something to kill them, B) make up your mind you're going to do it, get the weapon, and have at it, or C) do what Cameron suggested and just blow the opponent away with a gun. Distance weapons, people. No need to get all down and dirty.

--Using my "You are such an idiot" ratings system, this episode should've been a five-star, cause I didn't say until the end when President Logan's waxing poetic about his day and CRYING. The President is CRYING. And saying he doesn't know how much more he can take. Oh, please. Instead of trying to find the gas, they should be trying to find Logan's cajones, cause he has NONE! God, I hate this guy. Interestingly enough, I read an article with the actor playing Logan and he says people come up to him on the street and say anything from "You're no David Palmer" to more...let's say colorful things, and he doesn't know how to take it. He's proud he's doing a good job with the character, but man, is he going to be typecasted in the future.

--That tenure does not matter on this show as far as your character's death/exit. Lynn McGill, the Hobbit, dies heroically saving about 20 people in CTU. Tony Almeida--Mr. Michelle Dessler as I know him--dies waffling over the bad guy who then sticks some bad potion in his chest cavity. Not good. I'm alright with Lynn sacrificing himself b/c the whole thing was his fault. And it pays into my theory of no good can come from being head of CTU (George Mason, sacrifices saving everyone from a nuke; Jack's losses; Tony almost going to jail over being a traitor to save Michelle; and like I said, the lady last year). Bill Buchanon, watch your back! But Tony is a great character and deserved to go out more honorably. I almost would've preferred him to be in Lynn's place in the story, but I understand why they did it. I would've even preferred Peter Weller just shot Tony in the back, making it all the more about revenge when Jack gets his hands on him. But stabbed in the heart with the needle? Nah. Also, that little bit with the security guard with Lynn calling his family and stuff? Didn't need it. They wasted sentiment on a character I didn't give a rat's ass about. Sad he had to sacrifice through no fault of his own, but they didn't build up for me to feel anything for him as he talked to his daughter. Waste of plot to me.

--best line of the week goes to Chloe with the "I woke up in bed with a man I'll probably never see again and just watched my best friend die, so I'm not having a good day." Runner up was Chloe again with "What is it with you and breathing? Does that solve everything?"

--Kiefer's a great actor. Since about, I'd say Season three, we've seen maybe one or two moments a season where we actually see the day's effect on Jack. This time, it was done perfectly with him after he asked Lynn and the security guard to sacrifice themselves, and you saw it when Kim tells him she doesn't want to be around him and Audrey comes to comfort him. Great stuff.

Like I said, not a great episode, but necessary to get them out of the hole they dug themselves into with the previous episodes. Let's hope getting back on the main storyline brings back the action. And I can't wait to see how the surviving CTU folks we know and love thwart Homeland Security, who are arriving to bring the smackdown on them. Oh, and I think this is the end of what we've seen of Kim this season, which is fine b/c you get a little of Jack's soft side, and now she's gone, so poof, he can disappear again. And for those who didn't get the Pony Boy reference in the last blog (credit to those that used their own means to figure it out), C. Thomas Howell, Kim's boyfriend, played that role in Francis Ford Coppolla's "The Outsiders" way back in the day. Come on, people, you've got to have the IMDB and Google open when ya read this blog! :) Till next week....

24 This Week: 3/6/06

2006-03-10T22:06:00.000-08:00

Wow. Man. Wow.

Originally I was going to start this blog with the line, "No one can out-Chloe another coworker like Chloe, cause then people die" -- regarding Edgar's dismissal of Claire's hunch and trying to bring it to Edgar's attention, spelling her own certain doom in going to check it out.

But then I saw the end of the show. Wow. Man. Wow.

I'm going to be honest, I didn't think they'd do it. I thought surely he'd either make it in one of the rooms or get out. But as he turned the corner, I swear I sat there a good five minutes, hand to my mouth, eyes wide open. I ain't gonna lie, I don't know if it was because I didn't blink for the five minutes or I genuinely took in this harrowing moment--it was probably a little of both--but my eyes watered. I was and am blown away. I want to quickly say a thanks to my 24 buddies at work who, while telling me it's the best episodes of 24 they've seen this year, if not ever, they DID NOT give away the ending. I already thought it was great. The ending was just the icing on the cake. Wow. Man. Wow. Edgar, rest in peace, amigo. At least he's with his mom who was also another innocent victim. God, I sound like I'm giving the guy a eulogy...but man, it's Edgar!!!! Alright, let me get to the rest of the show:

What did we learn this week:

--that 24 is one of the best shows on TV, period. Yes, as fans know, it lapses somewhere in hour 7 with some absurd plotline that tests our faith in the series, let alone plausibility. BUT WE COME BACK. They make it too good overall for us to leave. How good is this show? It passes the legendary show test: we all know Jack Bauer is the baddest mo' fo' in the universe (second is David Palmer), super agent extraordinaire. We want to name our children after him. But for almost a good part of the Hour 1 of the 2-hour special, we don't really see Jack. We deal with the supporting characters and their situations. And that's the test: we actually care! We don't sit there going, "Show Jack, show Jack," we're actually invested in what's going on with them and in their story. All -- ALL -- great shows have this, and 24 proved it. Bravo to the writers and creators for building 5 years of investment well.

--I started singing "Secret Lovers" when Aaron and the First Lady held hands. If I were married to Logan, I'd like a Secret Service agent with backbone who cooly blew up a flamethrower, too. Look for Marty to start requesting Aaron on her details wherever she goes...and it ain't just for taking a bullet ;)

-- ...which leads me to my "Dear, God, you're an idiot" moment for President Logan this week. Grant you, it doesn't come until Hour 2, but declaring martial law on L.A.?!!!! Are you smoking weed? Does this man do nothing but take the advice of others and do whatever sounds right? Can he be this...inept? This stupid?! Everyone, say it with me now: "Pull out a gun and shoot him....PLEASE." I can't stand this. He's driving me to drink here! The only thing I can give him is that he did have the balls to stay with the call to let the terrorists gut the motorcade, but he shouldn't have made that deal in the first place. But I'm telling you, if they end this season with this dude still in office, oh, there will be a reckoning. I will rain fire down on Keifer and Joel Surnow and at least beg them to assasinate him in the first minute of the next season (see, I never said I'd stop watching. I love me some Jack Bauer, man!)

--Okay, okay, again, thanks to everyone for not revealing that Pony Boy Curtis is dating Kim Bauer. And what's with the goatee?! He has not aged well, but it could be the "look" they're giving his character. And Cameron, you were right. The best line award this week goes to when he starts mouthing off at Jack and Jack goes, "Kim," and dude is asked to leave the room. There's no threats, Jack doesn't even get in his face, it's just one word. That's Jack Bauer. I swear, I yelled at the TV, "Do you know who you are f-in' with, Pony Boy?"

--- and then Chloe mouths the words "Edgar," watching him die.....Wow. Man. Wow.

--So Tony asks Bill Buchanon who's responsible for killing Michelle and he gives him...Peter Weller? Oh, the man who happens to also be at CTU AND, due to the lockdown, is now in medical with Tony? Oh, I wonder if Tony will find out who he is, I don't know. Yes, that was sarcasm. :) So Bill couldn't tell him the Russian guy (Julian Sands)? Couldn't even tell him the man MOST directly responsible for killing Michelle was killed by Jack. Noooooo, we have to create conflict. Damn writers...

--CTU and security...come on, guys. I mean, I've got to admit, that was well done in that at least this bad guy went to a lot of trouble to obtain a card. But this place is a disaster when it comes to internal security. It's blown up in one season and now a lethal gas kills 40% of the personnel? They'd better offer a hell of a dental plan to employees.

------- and there's no sound when they count down to the end of the show cause they know we're just sitting there speechless and there's absolutely no way we think they've really killed Edgar. Wow. Man. Wow.

--Jack shoots JoBeth Williams. I could've gone either way on this. I didn't know if he was going to use her against him or not honestly. I know Jack is capable of it, but he believed she didn't know anything, so maybe he wouldn't shoot her? But when he did, man. That's just cold Weller still wouldn't give up the secrets. Women, take note: would your man let you take a bullet rather than give up a conspiracy to unleash poisoinous gas in Los Angeles? Think about it, cause you know it'll happen to, oh, everyone someday.

--Oh, and people are stupid in dealing with criminals. Exhibit A: Do you really think a dude is just going to hand over $20,000 for a security card? To a top secret (so they say) government facility? And he's not going to just kill you and keep the money? Come on! Exhibit B: when the CTU infiltrator takes the guard hostage...come on, man! You think once that guy gets the access out he needs, he's not going to kill you? That you'll be a bargaining chip? You're a security guard? You ain't Jack Bauer! You're expendable! At least say no and force him to drag your dead fingerprint around to get what he needs. Maybe it's just me, but I know no amount of bargaining in the world is going to make the bad guys change their mind. I'm not going to make it easier on them to do harm. Criminals are baaaaaaaad. You don't matter to them.

But man, what a great 2 hours. It's as Cameron said, they did everything that makes 24 great. Edgar...man. wow. man. I thought I was hurt by Michelle dyin'. So lingering questions:
where does Lynn end up in all of this? Did he make it out of his cell or is he holed up in CTU? Does the Russian President believe Logan when he says his wife's just looney, or does he suspect something? I can only dream cause that would get the loser out of office. Will Aaron and the First Lady run away together far away from the pressures of the White House? Will someone just make Mike Novak the President and call it a day? How long does anyone give Pony Boy before he says something to Jack and Jack has to either A) kill him or B) hurt him reeeeal bad?
All this and more next week! And this time I hope not to be too swamped with work to write!

24 This Week 2/28/06

2006-02-27T23:22:00.000-08:00

"You don't kill Jack Bauer. You only piss him off enough to torture you longer."

It's been said "24" would make a GREAT drinking game and I'm inclined to agree. The possibilities are endless. Drink every time Chloe gives a great zinger (twice if it's to Edgar)... Drink every time the words "CTU" are mentioned (THAT'S a hangover waiting to happen)... Drink whenever someone gets fired... and my personal favorite -- and guaranteed party all drink -- drink when Jack kills someone. This week's episode doesn't fail to disappoint...sorta.

What we learned this week:
-- I think I can now tell how good an episode is by how long it takes me to utter the phrase "You're an idiot!" right after President Logan does something or says something. If it's well within like, say, 15 minutes of the show, it's a good episode, within 5, we're in trouble. This week, clocking in close to 5 minutos, the minute the Leader of the Free World gets off the phone with his wife, the phrase shoots right out of my mouth. Come on, dude! Grow a pair! But Mike Novick wins the best line trophy this week for "No, it's really that simple," after our fearless leader expounds on the situation the First Lady has gotten him into. FYI: Another "You're an idiot" directly followed at the end of the episode when Logan hangs up with Julian Sands. And people made this dude a Senator in some state along the way?!

--I don't know about you, and grant you Henninger is not a public facility that makes nerve gas for the government, but when was the last time you had to submit a fingerprint AT THE FRONT DESK?! Just a thought. That's some tight ass security. CTU should be implementing this as standard procedure with all the moles and traitors they get every season. But hey, this Omni-nerve gas place also can be hacked into by Chloe, too, so nobody's perfect.

--Anybody that gets the jump on Jack Bauer has GOT to be good. Good to see Peter Weller outside the Robocop suit. Now all we need is for a gazillion ED-209s to show up at CTU, blow everyone away, and the circle would be complete (if you don't know that is, check out the movie or Google it, that's how I figured out its name)...

Oh, but wait, Jack Bauer doesn't get jumped, he only takes a quick nap to figure out how best to kill the fool in front of him.

--I never went through any formal training, but I know people who have AND I've watched a lot of this crap on Nat Geo and Discovery, and I believe the first thing you do when someone's shooting at your motorcade is DRIVE AWAY! Something tells me the best course of action is NOT to suddenly jump out of the car, guns blazing! Idiots! You protect the inhabitants and get away from the ambush to a more secure location! My law enforcement peeps, help me out here. Am I wrong? It was just dumb. Here, Mr. Terrorist, let me parallel park to give you full view of the limo in the sights of your gigantic bazooka. Please. "Thanks, signed....the terrorists."

--But on that note, Aaron, the Secret Service lead, is DA MAN and gets the Chloe O'Brien Kickass Award this week. My man wakes up, takes out his service weapon and literally vaporizes the opposition by shooting at the flamethrower's gas tank. I'm sorry, that was cool as all get out.

--The giants take over Hobbiton! Poor Samwise. He's going to little Hobbit jail to be put in a little Hobbit straight jacket. I want to see hands of people who really think he'll get anyone in Division to listen to him after they show what a raving loon he was. Oh, and your sister and the pimp still have your ID card. Explain that one to Mr. Frodo.

--Oh, another drinking game for this season only is drink when Audrey asks Jack an utterly useless question. Okay, so I'm calling in so you can give me a info and you're grilling me about my lead? Lucky the writers couldn't think of a better way to give out exposition or Jack would be saying, "Woman, look, I love you, I'm still going to leave at the end of this, but if you don't stop wastin' my time with 20 questions, I'm going to put this glock in yo' ass." And yes, Jack talks like Shaft every once in awhile...the Samuel L. Jackson Shaft, not Richard Roundtree--more angry. Audrey, come on. Even Chloe knows better than to do this stuff and she just lets ANYTHING come out of her mouth.

All in all, not as good as last week's episode, but it was for filling in the blanks, introducing Peter Weller as a baddie, and seeing yet another way Logan has to weasel his way out of a disasterous PR problem. This guy needs more help than Bode Miller.

NEXT WEEK: Two hours of pulse-pounding excitement! Will Tony peel back the bandages and break out into "Music of the Night?" Jack puts the hurtin' on Peter Weller! Will Martha leak to anyone but Aaron that her husband has no cajones? And aw, yeah...the return of everyone's favorite mischief maker, Kim Bauer! All the players are back, baby! Well, except for that awesome All State agent in the sky, David Palmer....

24 This Week: 2/20/06

2006-02-21T09:43:00.000-08:00

Okay, kids, so what have we learned from this week's 24:

-When Jack Bauer tells you to do something, you do it or you die. I mean, come on, Nathanson! Jack says he's got your back, he's got your back! I mean, it's just Jack vs. a helicopter! Sit there, watch him take it out, give him the info. But no, we want to help shoot it down. And now you're dead. Idiot!

-This season, if not just this single episode, should be shown in every civics and government class in every high school and college in America. Why? It illustrates how incredibly CRUCIAL it is to pick a good Vice President. President Logan is a tool, let's face it. Now, I don't know about you, but I'll admit, in past elections, I'm like most people: I don't give the Vice Presidential candidate much of a glance. I listen, I take in at least who he is and his background. But I don't really pay that much attention to what kind of leader he seems to be. Yes, I know this is just a TV show, but you'd better believe after seeing 24, I'm going to totally pay attention to the Veep in every election from now until the day I die. This dude could be in office someday! I have my problems with the current administration, but at least I know when the chips are down, Cheney could take over for Dubya and probably do the job better...although we'll probably invade a few countries, no one would see Cheney except once a year, and mysteriously major corporations would be making money, not losing it. But I know he's a decent leader! We just need to put a microwave next to him to take him out if he gets out of line...or wave a cheeseburger.

I mean, are they trying to make us hate Logan, 'cause they're certainly not making him a sympathetic character, just pathetic. I'll say it in every blog/email I do of this show: This dude better be dead when this is all over, I don't care if they make Mike Novick president in his place. The man gets a phone call directly from the terrorist and what is his response?! "I don't want to talk to him, isn't there someone else?" Dude, this isn't Johnny telling you he has a reason he was kissing Susie under the bleachers at the school dance! Logan might as well have been up in his room, head in a pillow crying, with fuzzy slippers on and a pint of Breyers. This is the man who has 19 canisters of nerve gas ready to use and you can't handle a negotiation? And why didn't they include CTU in on any of this once they hung up? If you're looking for someone to help you figure out what to do, um, wouldn't you call the guys whose job it is to actually deal with terrorists? Just a thought.

-Lynn is losing it, big time. The teaser shows that a coup de tat is imminent next week...either that or everyone's figured out they're working for a hobbit and they want to cash in with the National Inquirer. Lynn's got to know, anyone who let's his ass get kicked by a junkie pimp and his sister can't hold a position of authority. "Give me my card back"...."Audrey, you do not want to make an enemy of me, I promise you"....come on, man. You're Rudy! Get some pads on and get out on the field. Oh, and he should know things don't ever go well for a head of CTU. He should've just let Bill stay in charge, stayed in the background, and he wouldn't be having these problems. I mean, every head of CTU=problems. Tony Almeida-- blown all to hell, loses his wife. The lady last year -- crazy daughter who commits suicide under your watch. And Jack when he was head of CTU -- we all know that story. The moral of the story: don't be head of CTU. No good can come from it.

--Nice to see the guy from the movie "Warlock," Julian Sands, getting work. Missed seeing him.

--So how many people think that Martha got in the limo with the Soviet President out of guilt or to force her husband's hand to actually be a President? The way they set it up, it looked like guilt to me, but doing what she did may just avert World War 3 (sorry for the hyperbole, the show's rubbing off on me)

--and where's Kim like we were promised?! I want to see what kind of trouble she can get into in which Jack will somehow need to sacrifice himself.

And the winner of the Needless But Satisfying Death Award of The Week:
Erwich. 'cause even if you think you're the main man, there's always another main man ready to take you out should you mouth off and/or screw up. Rest in peace, comrade.

NEXT WEEK: Mutiny at CTU! Jack pays another visit to a building in downtown LA and goes all Neo again in the lobby! And no Edgar this week, will he return!? And what is up with my man Tony! They killed off the lovely Michelle for you, so they have to justify this to me somehow in the story. Tune in folks, same bat-time, same bat-channel...

World Champs

2006-02-20T23:23:00.000-08:00

Okay, so after much needling and prodding by my coworkers, and the vast amount of my friends' rantings and ravings online on everything from the Wizards, to movie reviews, to their children, I've finally decided to throw my hat into the ring. And I thought of no better subject for my inaugural blog than...the NFL World Champions, my team, the Pittsburgh Steelers.

Oh, yes, you will see a million-- or have already seen-- a million articles, sites, tattoos, various discreet and indiscreet crimes associated with my beloved Steelers. My blog? Well, perhaps I haven't had the chance to peruse all the related material to their stunning win in the Motor City, but every recap I HAVE read, hasn't talked about the true fact that this team, this Steeler team, was a team of destiny.

I know what you're saying. Yadda, yadda, yadda, everybody thinks when their team wins the big one, their team is the "Team of Destiny." But people, I'm serious. I mean, look at the facts -- and here's where I won't bore you with the entire season, just the playoffs:

We go up against Cincinnati first -- the Bungles, who finally look like THE BENGALS and have won our division. They crap all over us in our second meeting of the year. Some people attributed their ascendancy this year to a weak schedule, and to some extent that's true. But if you only used that, you'd be doing this team a huge disservice. Chad Johnson-- you tell me he won't be a top ten, if not top five receiver picked in fantasy drafts next season. Carson Palmer looked like he finally fulfilled the promise a lot of people saw in him. The D was playing great, TJ Houshmanzadeh (you say Houshmanzadah) was a great number two receiver...this team was hitting all cylinders. So when we play them in the opening rounds of the playoffs, take away the fact that we each had won one of the two contests we played against each other in the regular season. This was for pride. So the Bengals first play from scrimmage, Palmer throws up a loogie to Chad, he catches it--beating our secondary I've always thought questionable--and it looks like it's going to be one of those days. Flash back to Palmer...lying on the ground...in pain. Now, I've watched football since I was a kid. I've seen the Joe Theismann leg break on TV when it happened. I saw when Roy Williams horsecollared T.O. in the regular season to make him miss every game until LAST year's Superbowl. I'm no doctor, but the roll Von Olhoffen took to Palmer's leg didn't look that bad to me. I'm sorry. Blame my untrained eyes. I thought he'd just go off for a quarter or two, maybe a sprain, he'd come back. ACL and MCL injury....MAY make it to training camp, if not the beginning of the season. On a play IN THE BEGINNING OF THE GAME, and on one that I honestly thought the hit wasn't that bad, we accidentally took away the field general. It was then I knew the Football Gods were smiling on us. Jon Kitna, contrary to popular belief, is not a bad quarterback. Just a season ago, he led the Bengals almost to the post season if I recall. He played well in Seattle when he was there. But he's no Carson Palmer. We won, 31-17. Just hands down beat the pants off of 'em. Destiny enters the picture.

So we get to the Colts. Probably the biggest debacle on Monday Night Football ever in the regular season...okay, that's just in the minds of us Steelers fans, but for us it's like number two nightmare behind the Neil O'Donnell Super Bowl (there's no number to this Super Bowl. It is simply known to us as the Neil O'Donnell Bowl). But needless to say, in that MNF contest, we looked like Master P against Fred Astaire in a dancing contest. So the oddsmakers, the fans, any sane individual would be right in picking the Colts, who almost went undefeated all season, who were the odds-on favorite to get to the Super Bowl if not outright win it. And then we played. It was beautiful to watch as a Steelers fan because even though doubt always clouds a game for us, there's a nugget of hope. And as that game goes along and we play well, that hope grows, and grows, and grows and we become the loudest mo' fo's you ever had in your bar. I won't even get into the bad calls, the penalties, and the Troy Palamalou interception that was a key play of the game not only for possession, but for what happened next, but let's say the Colts were fighting the Football Gods something fierce. You gotta respect that. But I say again...Team O' Destiny. We just need to give Jerome the ball at the one, he gets an easy TD to keep the clock running and we go on to the Broncos. There's the fumble. The dude whose wife STABBED him, was not expected to even play in the game, picks up the ball....and makes the dumbest decision he'll ever remember. His right side completely clear along the sideline, he instead goes to the middle of the field where Ben Rothlisberger makes what is now known as...The Tackle. Saves our season. If the Colts score on that run back, there is no way we are winning that game. Period. So the Colts --man, I've got to find their mojo and sell it -- still manage to get in field goal range that can tie up the game and send it into overtime. No fan wants their team who's winning to go into overtime by the way. It reeks of doom and a long night of picking up pieces of your TV after you've thrown it when your team does something idiotic to let the other team win. So out comes the most reliable kicker in the NFL, the Drunken Kicker. It's something like 30, 40 yards, no problem for this guy. He misses. And he doesn't just miss...he misses SPECTACULARLY. No bad snap. No bad foot plant. No block on it. The ball just...doesn't go through the uprights. To quote Al Micheals: "Do you believe in miracles? Yes!"

So here come the Broncos. Jake Plummer has been on fire all season and has been the Jake the Snake of old with no mistakes and getting his team to the playoffs. But they didn't even have half the mojo to thwart the Football Gods that the Colts did because it wasn't even really hard. I didn't get to watch this game all the way live; I was working so I Tivo-ed it. I watched the second half live and thought, "Was the whole game like this?" and many people said yes. But when I watched the replay, I thought the Broncos were giving it to the Steelers...for about a quarter. Then we opened the can of whoopass on 'em. Another team that had been projected to go far into the playoffs, was playing stellar football on both sides of the ball all season long, and us-- the number six seed -- were going to the Super Bowl. Sure we had fancy gimmicks, but for the most part, we played what is now Steeler football: passing to set up the run. Hadn't been done in a lot of years, but look where it got us when we did it in the '70s, and look what happened at Super Bowl XL. And so we get to the Super Bowl, in Detroit this year, the hometown of the fifth leading rusher in NFL history who happens to be playing for our team and is thinking retirement. This year would probably be his last and they ACTUALLY MAKE IT TO THE SUPERBOWL. You know the rest.

I recently wore my XL gear to work, my hat and my shirt. Again started up the "Oh, it should have an asterik by it," and the "the refs wanted you guys to win like they wanted the Colts to win when you played them." I laugh at all these whinings, but I have issues with them. If you're going to use the Colts analogy, look what happened! We won DESPITE the refs blowing calls in the Colts favor. That should tell you, it can be done if a team gets its head out of its ass and tries to win a game, not use poor clock management, drop balls, and commit penalties. Honestly, I feel for Seahawk fans. At one point or another, every team feels robbed of a win by refs, and because its the Super Bowl, it's just way bigger than every other time. And I will give them that the push off call on Darrell Jackson was a ticky tack foul--but it was a foul. And I will give them that the holding call that called back the one-yard line catch by Stupid Loudmouth TE, aka Jeremy Stevens, was not a hold. And I will say the penalty assessed to them because of Matt Hasselbeck's supposed "illegal tackle" was nonexistent. But everything else in that game, they should have been able to overcome. Yeah, it's hard to overcome stuff when you feel the refs, and the world, is against you, so it's hard for you to win, to muster up that extra effort. But isn't that what's called character? It's been said many a time that football, and most other sports for that matter, is a game about heart. If you have the strong enough heart, if you have the strong enough character, if you want to WIN bad enough, you overcome that stuff and just freakin' win the game. So no more whining, Seattle fans. I fully expect that now that the players know what's expected of them going into that event, what they need to do as a team to survive, they just might win if they get there again next year. If they can put down their lattes long enough ;)

Team of Destiny, ya'll. Jerome, I'm glad we could send you out on top, baby...